Chris Lewis

stuff my kids say mixed with pop culture but mostly dad jokes.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

If you've ever thought "It's probably an ok idea to have newborm twins during a pandemic" let me stop you right there.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

My kids thinking a 40oz Stanl*y travel mug is cool is perhaps the greatest marketing trick of all time.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

Me: let’s go get mom a Starbucks gift card.
4 yr old daughter: Can I get a drink?
Me: What would you even get, a milk? We have milk at home.
Her: a dragon fruit refresher.
Looks it up, finds out that’s a real drink.
Me: “We’re doomed.”

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@GinoHard_ Believe this is referred to as a moon landing.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@LockedNHLBruins @iancmclaren 3 Marchand dives. Min.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren All I'm saying is, he's not on anyone's team in our 14 team, 35 man roster spots, dynasty league.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

Decided to be more adventurous in 2024. Went sledding with the kids and decided to show off by treating a sled like a snowboard. Now I walk with a limp and 2023 doesn’t seem that bad.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

Rumour going around my kid’s Grade 2 class that holding up the pinky is the middle finger in Chinese. Please be true.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren Gibson please.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren Can opener bro. It’s not hard.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

My wife: your 3 year old son just said “won't forget you, safe travels, miss ya miss ya miss ya”
Me: was that a message for me or you?
My wife: it was for the FedEx delivery guy.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren Just waiting for my Bluesky invite.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren Ian, you’ve been hacked!

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

As far as children’s stories go, we generally agree that in Goldilocks, Papa Bear’s porridge in the big bowl should actually be the coldest…right?

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@ldl716 Ah yes, the guy with one previous career playoff series win is now an expert and knows what it takes.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@MikeInBuffalo The guy who had exactly one career playoff series win before this year is now the expert on “what it takes”.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren Look at us agreeing on something.

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren I meant of all the options available landing on nick foligno is a quite a take!

[Chris Lewis @cjacksonlewis]

@iancmclaren Out of everyone. Everyone? Everyone?!!