Wildo

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

[IN THE JUNGLE]

Scientist: What are we going to call this new monkey species?

Me: Macaque

Scientist: *obviously irritated* One more dick joke and I'll end your career!

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

*fact check system testing*

Spoiler Alert: Nikocado Avocado will be featured in the new Fortnite season tomorrow …

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

@bewgtweets It's all fun and games until they grow up and blame you for their terrifying childhood ...

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

@Its_Miss_Riss I would have a comment for this, but I don't want to get cancelled and have to show pictures of my toes again to make money. I mean how would I even do that?

... Find out at https://t.co/graI5wFDy5

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

JOURNEYMAN TWITTER: We got this lads, it’s only a matter of time before one of them slips up and we’ll be there to punish their misspelled words!! *evil laughs*

[VeggieWagon on the other one too @VeggieWagonYee]

Shout out your crushes, life is short. If 50 of you do it here, I’ll tag all of mine and say why 😘

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

Tomato: *blushing*

Salad Dressing: ... get over it Tom, I'm over you

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

@PLATINUM2000 Umm ... hired?

[Boog @bewgtweets]

Her: how many children do you want

Me: *lowering the menu* what the hell kind of restaurant is this

[Be The Cookie @BeTheCookie]

At my age, I can only provide you with a screaming orgasm if I use spiders right at the end.

[𝚔𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚛𝚒𝚌𝚔 𝚕𝚘𝚋𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛 @KLobstar]

no don’t do it

[Buc 🆓️ @BucMarvin]

When we're delighted shouldn't it be dark?

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

@BucMarvin This is so cleverly subtle - love it

[FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF @sofarrsogud]

The only thing worse than eating salad is paying to eat salad.

- Confucius

[Wildo @ClickBaite]

Laughs when I hear people trying to “digital detox” ... more bandwidth for me

[WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket]

Guys, I gotta run. I left the fire place video streaming.

[stACED @girl_a_whirl]

Her: Uh baby, is it supposed to glow like that?

Him: It's a Glo-worm Marsha! What did you think would happen when you rubbed it?

[mustard clown @markydoodoo]

be the reason birds squawk in terror when you go outside

[Marly @VerbsRProudest]

*whispering* A lot of people on twitter appear to have eaten 2 wolves.