clit taurus 💀

Your resident Helen of Troy / “an intimidating presence”

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

Happy non-binary day, I go by any pronouns meaning I accept:
She like a ship/the moon
He like how a dog is just a little a guy
They as in the all knowing force referred to in the phrase “they say that..”
It as in an unknowable eldritch entity
Or any others you find fun and sexy

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

90s Nicole Kidman just one chance PLEASE

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

One time I asked a film bro if there was a difference or if using film was just to be pretentious and after a while he admit it��s just to be pretentious. I spent the rest of the night calling Birds Of Prey: And The Fantabulous Emancipation of one Harley Quinn “the only film ever”

[project hail mew ★ @larscenes]

okay serious (and dumb) question: are 'film' and 'movie' synonyms? cause i've been using them as such but something tells me it's not the same uh

[(not) NOT jackson @JacksonFromTwit]

drinking with someone who likes martinis is always weird cuz they’re like “i want it filthy and wet raw missionary with eye contact and sloppy making out” like alright man. cool. im happy u found a drink u like

[A. @abbsoul]

And for the lady, perhaps a week of dissociation on the beach?

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

Anyone wanna get lost at sea in a t4t way?

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

“Have you ever seen the movie Brave?”

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

Getting bought a shot on St. Paddy’s at the Irish pub because I look Scottish

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

Nearly a year later they unprompted told me “Tess I have to come clean, I lied in my job interview when I said I’d never seen the bee movie. It’s just the only fun fact I could think of was that pigs orgasm for 10 minutes and I didn’t think I should say that in a job interview”

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

One time I was giving a job interview and I asked their favorite fun fact and they recited the first line from the bee movie and then when I asked “isn’t that from the bee movie?” they said they didn’t know, as they’d never seen the bee movie

[trash jones @jzux]

one time a job interviewer asked my friend about his hobbies and he panicked and said "baking bread." he was so wracked with guilt that during his next interview he said "i need to tell you something. i don't bake bread. i'm sorry i don't know why i lied"

[zae @itszaeok]

wicked for good is good if you have goodness in your heart. so if you didn't like it idk

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

I have been changed for good (yes I secretly cried multiple times in the theater what of it)

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

I hate Gay Halloween what do you mean you’re a Green Monster & Red Bull, The Twilight: Breaking Dawn Wedding Nightmare Sequence, and your own cats for Halloween

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

@zoloftslut There’s something called batwing arms?? That’s sick as fuck

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

@zoloftslut I could be the 25-year old she steps out with after the divorce 😩

[clit_taurus Stan Account (formerly Skeleton Kay) @Ennerey2]

Forget baseball, slutting it up is America’s national pastime

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

Me and the autistic bestie in high school accidentally mirroring each other back and forth to fit in because we didn’t know we were autistic

[clit taurus 💀 @clit_taurus]

William Shakespeare walked so that ABC’s Revenge could run