Clovis McClovis

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[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

the day your baby stops cryin' is the day she done figured out you was lyin', now back to that ham juicer clog

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

@poot i'm doing this tweet whatall to prove i kin stillnuseit bitch le shay

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

@Alvah did you know you are associated with chet fussman? sounds like the name of ah manly yet grumpy underwear designer

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

ah hell i need to clear a clog from my ham juicer

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

why ain't nobody 'spondin' this twitterin id fer the birds and folks what all done run right outta ridlin

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

Twistin' the tails off my stuffed pig collection

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

I'm scratchin' my nethers with ah steel wool pad attached to an extenda pole so i can get to the back ah 'em

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

Where's my lord and savior when I'ma oggling a poop shoot da size of ah Ayers rock?

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

why was I attracted to a woman with an ass the size of a Ford Aerostar?

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

when I left the kick boxing class, I just kept on kicking, and people did not take it as sign of affection

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

hmmm... head cheese or black puddin' i'm never sure what to use as orgy fuel, everbody wants both, i say give the people what they want

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

Elrod... well he smells like old man boxer shorts hand wash and hung to dry on a shower rod

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

alvah smells like the elephant pen at the zoo

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

Poot smells like the first blast of air from an approaching subway train

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

Chuck Norris does not own a house. He approaches house at random and makes the people there move

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

Thinking about the time my ex-wife and I went on a picnic. We ate, then killed ants as a competition. She won but she was using an axe

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

thinking about the time I went dancing with my ex-wife. We had fun
'till I karate kicked her, then she hit me an ice cream carton

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

once i spied a girl going into the liquor store, now my spying eye needs a work up

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

praying for the day when poot will have hair like Frampton

[Clovis McClovis @Clovis]

Thinking about how gay alvah is for not writing me, wedgies at the Prom, and dead mothers