The 90s Guy

Stupid jokes.
No agenda.

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

1/ Hi there! I'm The 90s Guy. People say I'm stuck in the past and maybe they're right. But, what's better than a Friday night in 1996? Cruising to the Blockbuster, windows down, smoking Newports, with Pantera blasting on the cassette deck...maybe grab some Zimas and Jolly Ranchers on the way home.
No staring at a phone with a crooked neck for hours on end. No endless notifications stealing your peace. No doom scrolling through everyone's filtered highlight reels. Just a simpler life where you could get arrested and not have the bodycam video plastered all over YouTube.
I make jokes cast from my 90s time capsule, trying to lighten up these dark 2026 days.
So, give me a follow and let's have some laughs together.
Or don't. It's fine. Seriously.

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@TMZ

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@RetroNewsNow So, who did they sex up?
I'm going to say Brandon...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@TMZ

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@TMZ Finally!!!
I've been losing sleep waiting for her to break her silence...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@landofthe80s Compliments of Prince...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@RetroNewsNow Yeah...the restaurants are much better than the crappy show was...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@nypost New look brought to you by Ozempic...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@people

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

Doomscrolling for six hours then wondering why you’re miserable. 90s we flipped three channels of nothing and still went outside.

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@RealCarrotTop @TonyHinchcliffe @KILLTONY @LuxorLV Who's that homeless guy with him?

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@Variety Still looks the same as when she did the Poker Face video...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@RetroNewsNow I don't want to spoil the ending, but it turns out to be Jon Voight's butthole... terrible movie.

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@nypost Woops...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@RetroNewsNow And we're still waiting for her to explain it all...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@nypost Come on now...that dude has to be too old to be eligible for college baseball...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@kissfanforlife @heyitsmeCarolyn Oh boy... you're an overweight KISS fan, aren't you?
Dress up like a stuffed Gene Simmons, don't you?

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@BLABBERMOUTHNET They should check out that new singer for Twisted Sister, Sebastian Bach...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@nypost Thought he was broke...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@BLABBERMOUTHNET Possible shows of Andreas and dudes that are not original Sepultura...

[The 90s Guy @clueless90sguy]

@TMZ Is that his daughter there?