Bolt

Search your souls, assholes. ✌🏼

[Bolt @cmickydee]

I love this nerd

[Bolt @cmickydee]

I was thinking about going to the Utes BYU Game, until I realized I could by an airline ticket, fly to Phoenix to watch my Packers play, and fly home, all the while saving 130 bucks 😂

[Bolt @cmickydee]

Gas station guy said:

“You were born in the 1900’s right?”

“yeah man”

“Sick”

And that was that.

[Bolt @cmickydee]

They sell Popeyes Blackened Ranch at Walmart now. Proof god exists and is among us

[Bolt @cmickydee]

They had a fucking CHRISTMAS COMMERCIAL after the NFL Season Starter. I’m crying. 🍻

[Bolt @cmickydee]

WELCOME HOME BIG DAWG 🍻💚💛

[Micah Parsons @MicahhParsons11]

Thank you Dallas ….. GO Pack Go! 🧀🟢🟡

[Bolt @cmickydee]

I fuckin love that my dog gives off the same facial expressions I do 😂

[Bolt @cmickydee]

Fuck it, pay check hit just in time. God bless @McDonalds

[Bolt @cmickydee]

My Mom made Twinkie Twix Hot Dogs with Ketchup and Mustard Vanilla Frosting. I fucking love America.🤘🏼

[Bolt @cmickydee]

Welp, tinder is exactly what I expected.

“What’s the best place to eat around here?”

“Depends on what you wanna eat 😉”

Jesus Christ 😂💀

[Bolt @cmickydee]

My Mom’s DoorDash driver walked up her sidewalk next door at the literal exact same time my UberEats driver walked up mine, it was like living in a simulation 😂

[Bolt @cmickydee]

Please explain why my neighbors across the street can get pizza but not me. I miss you. 😭😭😭 @dominos

[Bolt @cmickydee]

I need to stay tf off Temu, I just bought a T-Shirt that says “Taylor Swift” with a bunch of headshots of Dog The Bounty Hunter on it

[Bolt @cmickydee]

He
(some cow somewhere)

has died for my sins
(double quarter pounder w/cheese)

[Bolt @cmickydee]

Somebody hire Tom Brady again, I’m tired of the Chiefs 😅

[Bolt @cmickydee]

If the celery in your Bloody Mary isn’t your Christmas Breakfast, what are you doing??

[Bolt @cmickydee]

“I hate to see Caleb Williams labia hurting”

My dad: “what’s that?”

😂

[Bolt @cmickydee]

Whoever decided to have a Packers Sunday Night Football Game on at the same time as the Yellowstone series finale better watch their back bro

[Bolt @cmickydee]

Today in the world. Steelers by 2, Packers by 1, and World War 3? Okay 😅💁🏿‍♀️

[Bolt @cmickydee]

THANK FUCKIN GOD 😅😅

[Green Bay Packers @packers]

THE FG IS BLOCKED FOR THE WIN!

#GBvsCHI

[Bolt @cmickydee]

I hope Mike Tyson bites Jake’s Paul’s ear off 😂