Coach Matty

Results Only Online Coaching. The Go To Fat Loss Coach For The Modern Day Football Fan. Hit the link below to get on the priority list.

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

6 days.

That’s when doors open for the next Results Only intake.

And before you ask…
Yes, it’s £99.

For 8 weeks of coaching.

You can’t even fill your car up for that these days without crying at the pump.

56 days of world class coaching for less than the price of a cup of coffee a day.

Now watch what your brain does…

“Is it worth it?”
“Will it work?”
“I’ll think about it…”

Same pattern. Same result 😴

Meanwhile, the people who actually change their bodies just make a decision and get on with it.

If you want a spot, you need to be on the priority list.

Because when this goes live, it won’t hang around. And we only have 30 spaces at £99.

So if you’re serious about sorting yourself out…
Link in bio. Get on the list.

Or keep “thinking about it” for another 6 months.

Your call.

#ResultsOnly

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

Right.

Let me take you back to the Hippodrome Casino.

A place where we’d bump into people such as Ian Beale and Gok Wan on a. Regular basis.

It’s 2014 and I’m with my mate Bullet.

Packed.
Busy.
Bit of chaos.
Standard.

I’m stood there minding my own business when suddenly… I feel a hand near my back pocket.

Now in my head?

Pickpocket.

Wallet gone.

Game over.

No hesitation.

Instinct kicks in and I donkey kick straight backwards like I’m auditioning for Wayne Rooney’s Street Striker.

Turn around ready to square up…

And instead of some dodgy bloke nicking wallets…

It’s a poor woman on a hen do.

Who, it turns out, wasn’t trying to rob me…

She was just copping a feel of my arse.

Absolutely booted her into next week for no reason.

Now… aside from me nearly getting escorted out of the downstairs table room and ruining someone’s night…

There’s a point here.

Because in that moment, I reacted to what I thought was happening.

Not what was actually happening.

And this is exactly what most people do with their fitness.

They feel something…

See the scale go up…

Have a bad day…

And immediately react.

‘Fat gain.’
‘Plan’s not working.’
‘I need to change something.’

When in reality?

It’s just water.

Stress.

Food volume.

Normal fluctuations.

This is where coaching matters.

Because what you can’t see, a good coach can.

I can see patterns.
I can see trends.
I can see what’s actually going on behind the scenes.

So instead of you panicking and donkey kicking your entire plan into oblivion…

I step in and go

‘Relax. Stay the course.’

Most people don’t fail because the plan doesn’t work.

They fail because they react emotionally to things they don’t fully understand.

They change things too early.

They overcorrect.

They sabotage themselves.

Coaching isn’t just about telling you what to eat and how to train.

It’s about stopping you from making stupid decisions in moments where you think you know what’s going on…

But don’t.

So next time something feels ‘off’…

Before you go full Hippodrome donkey kick on your diet…

Take a breath.

Chances are, nothing’s actually wrong.

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

@ronalda62784817 Thank you!

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

If you’ve been wondering why I have gone a bit quiet lately… there’s a good reason.

Five weeks ago my partner and I had our first child.

Ava Ali Pullan arrived and immediately began her campaign to completely dismantle any routine I thought I had.

Now I’ll be honest with you.

I knew having a newborn would be hard.

But I didn’t quite appreciate how hard.

For the first few weeks it was basically survival mode.

Sleep? Optional.

Routine? Non-existent.

Productivity? Laughable.

You think you’ll just “work around it”… until you’re three coffees deep, running on two hours sleep, and wondering why you just walked into the kitchen holding a baby and a banana like it’s a microphone.

It’s taken me about five weeks to properly get my head around it all.

Balancing working from home, being a dad, helping my partner, and trying to keep the business ticking over has been… interesting.

But slowly and surely, we’re cracking it.

We’ve found a rhythm.

Not perfect.

But functional.

And it’s made me reflect on something quite funny.

Over the years I’ve coached a lot of parents who’ve had newborns.

And I’d always give them the same advice.

“Stay organised.”
“Prep your meals.”
“Plan ahead.”
“Keep your routine tight.”

All very sensible advice.
And also… slightly naive.

Because when you’re operating on two hours sleep, have a tiny human screaming like a smoke alarm every few hours, and you’re just trying to keep everyone alive…

You don’t exactly stand there calmly weighing chicken breast and prepping your quinoa.

You grab whatever food requires the least amount of brain power.

Which is why the last few weeks have involved a surprising amount of:
Cold meats.
Random snacks.
Coffee.
And the occasional meal eaten while standing over the sink like a raccoon.

Now don’t get me wrong, the experience is incredible.
I wouldn’t change it for anything.

But it’s also a very humbling reminder that life doesn’t always care about your perfect plan.

And sometimes the best you can do is survive the chaos and slowly rebuild structure around it.

Which, thankfully, is exactly where we are now.

Ava’s settling.

Sleep is improving slightly.

Work rhythm is returning.

And content from me will be returning to normal as well.

Thanks for bearing with me while I figured out how to keep a baby alive and run a business at the same time.

Turns out it takes a bit of practice.

Matty “currently powered by coffee and questionable sleep” Pullan

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

@RahimH94 Thanks mate!

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

On the bounce back from what has felt like the plague. Will get back to messages this evening 🙏

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

January Group coaching sign ups… keep an eye on your inbox & messages this afternoon 👀

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

@coast2coast84 😂😂

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

Fail to prepare. Prepare to fail.

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

🚨 The January program is LIVE.

30 spots only at the Black Friday discount - and the first 10 people who sign up go into a raffle to get the whole thing FREE.

8 weeks.
Structure.
Accountability.
Training.
Nutrition.
Real results — not Instagram fantasy.

Once the 30 are gone, that’s it.

👉 https://t.co/QCC6lZMWlT

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

https://t.co/b59OEmERfq

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

@davidisaacs__ True story 😂😂

[Coach Matty @coachmattyp]

Right.

Story time.

And before you ask, yes, this actually happened.

So I’m on the London Underground, minding my own business, headphones in, doing that dead eyed commuter stare we all do so nobody attempts conversation.

Train pulls into King’s Cross.

A couple of Chinese chicas get on. Big fluffy coats, bigger smiles, full tourist energy.

They sit opposite.

One of them looks at me.

Double takes.

Whispers to her mate.

Points.

Giggles.

I’m thinking,

“Sh*t. I’ve got something on my face here.”

Next thing I know, one of them leans over…

“Excuse me… are you Ben Affleck?”

Now.

There was a moment

a split second

where my ego said

“You handsome bastard. Take the win.”

Trying my best to hold a straight face. Yes, yes I am.

To which one of them practically jumped on my lap for a photo.

An awkward smile later and not knowing where to put my hands with this bird sat in my lap. I held in my laughter with other people on the tube giggling away to themselves.

Picture done.

She shot up and sat back down.

Composed myself. Breathed a sigh of relief.

And then Chica number two stood up and hopped on for a photo and asked for a fucking autograph.

An autograph ffs.

One of them even said

“We love your films!”

Proceeding to sign

“Healthy regards. Ben Affleck”

That was me done.

I was supposed to be on until Canning Town about 12 stops further down the line.

But being Ben Affleck took its toll. I hopped off for a breather and a flat white.

Anyway

Why am I telling you this?

Because this whole situation taught me something important

People will believe ANYTHING if they want to believe it.

And that’s exactly what most people do every December

“I’ll start in January.”
“It’ll be easier next month.”
“It’s not the right time right now.”
“I’ll magically become consistent in the new year.”

Absolute bollocks.

Worse than thinking I’m Ben Affleck.

If you want actual results, not delusion, not wishful thinking… you need a plan that works now, not a dream you hope magically kicks in after Christmas.

And that’s exactly why I created the VIP Black Friday offer.

You get:
•The full 8-week January group coaching program
•PLUS the December Survival Plan
So you don’t roll into January looking and feeling like you’ve been living inside a tin of Celebrations.

VIP Price: £129

(Normal Jan price = £175)

And only 20 people get the December plan.

If you want a REAL head-start. The kind my clients use to drop 1kg+ per week

Stop believing the “January me will sort this” lie.

Batman can’t save you.

Ben Affleck can’t save you.

(Especially not the knock-off version signing autographs on the Jubilee line.)

But this will

👇 Grab one of the VIP Black Friday spots:

https://t.co/QCC6lZNubr

Before the remaining spaces vanish faster than my dignity on that train.

Matt “Definitely Not Ben Affleck” Pullan