Coladash

Collectibles/ Hobby Store Owner, trying to forcefully pass the Dad Joke torch to my children through over-exposure...

[Coladash @coladash]

A photographer was tragically crushed when a massive block of cheddar fell on him.

In fairness, the people he was photographing tried to warn him....

[Coladash @coladash]

When older people say, “Enjoy them while they are young”, they are talking about your knees and hips, not your kids...

[Coladash @coladash]

I tried a non-alcoholic beer last night and I think I have discovered what my favourite ingredient in beer is...

[Coladash @coladash]

Went to the doctor with a suspicious looking mole.
He said they all look that way and I should have left him in the garden....

[Coladash @coladash]

I bought 10 asparagus spears at the store but when I got home, I realized I had 11. That one was just a spare, I guess...

[Coladash @coladash]

My wife is taking me to an outdoor pub that has axe throwing.
I always wondered how she'd make it look like an accident...

[Coladash @coladash]

I wanted to find out if people in my neighbourhood would live in a giant tent, so I'm canvassing the area...

[Coladash @coladash]

Roses are red,
chocolate is nice.
I'll get yours tomorrow,
because they'll be half price...

[Coladash @coladash]

Elton John brought his pet rabbit to the gym. It's a little fit bunny...

[Coladash @coladash]

Are the unmarried employees at Kraft known as Kraft Singles?

[Coladash @coladash]

Last summer I took a poll, and 100% of the people in the tent were annoyed...

[Coladash @coladash]

Alright, time to give this "Dry January" a go...

[Coladash @coladash]

Never lie to an X-ray technician. They can see right through you...

[Coladash @coladash]

I went to the zoo the other day and an elephant tried to charge me. I told him I’d already paid...

[Coladash @coladash]

My friend said he didnt understand cloning. I said, "that makes two of us"...

[Coladash @coladash]

I woke up this morning to find that someone had dumped a load of Lego bricks on my doorstep. I don’t know what to make of it...

[Coladash @coladash]

I tried to make reservations at the library. Unfortunately, they were booked...

[Coladash @coladash]

I’ve been to the dentist a lot. I know the drill...

[Coladash @coladash]

A police officer caught two kids playing with a car battery and a firework. He charged one and let the other one go....

[Coladash @coladash]

I’m practicing for a bug-eating contest and I’ve got butterflies in my stomach...