Colton the 🤡

Surviving but slowly dying. TAMU '20

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

"Are you emotionally unstable or are you serious?"

[Khem Birch Society @NBABabySecret]

Doing this at an RFK rally

[Guilty as Slade? ✨🤌🏼 @Jesse_bslade]

this legit must be how katniss felt when they made her do the hunger games a second time

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

I have not slept in 40 hours and I am more coherent than these geriatrics

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

@ariyah_j

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

@ariyah_j Glow up of the decade

[Ariyah @ariyah_j]

Dreaming of the day my spouse and I go to Costco and buy toilet paper in bulk

[TB4A.com @TheBig4Tweets]

interns when you finally start getting some work done

[TB4A.com @TheBig4Tweets]

“Are you a morning or a night person?”

Accountants:

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

@ariyah_j I’ve been saying this for a while now

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

@ariyah_j @UNTsocial It smelled the trash on you

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

Starting class on the first Friday of January is unethical and illegal

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

@ariyah_j We’re ready

[alezander @alezvnder]

worker: the sauce is in the bag

me at home:

[𝔖𝔢𝔯𝔯𝔞𝔫𝔬 @serranogotjokes]

I’m naturally funny because my life is a joke 😔

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

Update: This girl is accusing me of plagiarism.......because of course I’d steal from someone who doesn’t know fourth grade grammar.

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

If you are a SENIOR in COLLEGE and don’t know the difference between than and then, I shouldn’t have to peer edit your paper.

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

@hyein_chong

[Colton the 🤡 @coltone98]

Happy birthday to my oldest wife. You’re basically a grandma now, but 22 never looked so good.