James Alderson

Comedian, founder of Stitches Comedy Clubs and fan of everything 80s!

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

Find me at @GunwharfQuays hosting Comedy At The Tower on Friday 1st May! Amazing setting and marina - tickets from https://t.co/7p6MR7JIzC

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@RoyalMail - for the love of god can someone help with a delivery i urgently need today but for some reason your useless driver can’t find his way around a diversion sign to get to us. We live 30 seconds walk past the road closure too so he has options. I must get the post today!

[Jo Caulfield @Jo_Caulfield]

EASTBOURNE ... Thursday 25th February

Devonshire Park Theatre - Tickets on sale now

https://t.co/Hs85GaEi2Y

@scottbcomedyuk @SimonBrodkin @comedyjames

[Eastbourne Theatres @EBTheatres]

This show will leave you in stitches! 🤣

We're bringing three huge names to the Devonshire Park Theatre next week to bring the laughs to town! Opening with Scott Bennett fresh from two sell-out tours, true comedy royalty Jo Caulfield and prank legend Simon Bodkin, all hosted by the award-winning James Alderson.

🎟️Limited tickets left! Get your with the link below.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

Hope Andrew had a lovely birthday.

I’m guessing he was wishing he was blowing candles in the west wing though, rather than cock in D wing.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@LangmanVince Tell us you’re old without saying you’re old.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@EndWokeness It’s weird how some people don’t actually understand. She’s referring to all the “illegals” being removed from America. If you live there you can just exist there & that’s fine she says but nobody gets to decide who lives there & who doesn’t as it’s all someone else anyway.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@tina92272 @OliLondonTV She’s saying nobody is illegal on stolen land. Meaning that the ICE crackdown on illegals and sending them back to their country isn’t right as they aren’t illegals as nobody owns America except the native tribes. Doesn’t mean she needs to move out 😂 the opposite actually.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@MarindaVannoy1 😂😂😂😂

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@WhiteHouse Fuck me. It’s so scary to think that people leading the US don’t know how the environment works. You do know that when the polar regions warm up it sends arctic weather south yeah?

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@HisenseUK quietest washer dryer in the world?? Noisiest maybe? What’s wrong with this. We’ve levelled it. Got a pad under the feet and still it’s rickety like this. It isn’t knocking against anything either. This is the casing or something internal.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@elonmusk Shut up you tit - At least UK people know when someone stands in front of a car or to the side of it.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

I think Donald Trump actually only wants Greenland as he thinks it’s a huge theme park for golfing. ⛳️

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

I heard Trump has been given a FIFA peace prize. Isn’t that the wrong game?

Think they meant to give him the Call of Duty one.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@HisenseUK is this the quietest washer dryer on the market? It was quiet to start with. A month in and it’s as rickety as the old machine we had.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@calvinrobinson Ever heard of a thing called the crusades mate?

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@PressSec @BBCNews @GBNEWS Do be quiet 😂

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@ValentinaForUSA I honestly thought this was a joke parody account.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@jackunheard I’ve just realised you must eat McDonald’s with a knife and fork.

[James Alderson @comedyjames]

@elonmusk Meanwhile school shootings happen daily in the states. Lucky this guy didn’t have a gun eh? Wonder why that is?