Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ

ㅤㅤ𝑺𝒐 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒎𝒚 『мιи∂』 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒔,
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ𝒊𝒕 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒊𝒕𝒔 𝒘𝒂𝒚 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒐『γου』.

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

ㅤㅤㅤ𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒂𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈,
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ 𝒎𝒚 𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎 𝒐𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒐𝒆𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒆𝒏𝒅.

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

I want you to know that even in the most tumultuous times of your life , there will be people here who love you because you deserve to be loved.

You could be the reason I take my final breath , and I would still love you. ”

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

He is vain , there's never been a doubt of that. Beneath it , a neglected child. One who spent all his formulative years being told he is the root. He's the cause of his mother's pain , her instability , the reason his own father left. Everything bad is his fault.

⤾

[— ✧.* 𓂀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺. @oasisdevoid]

⠀
while he was able to keep his shock inside , confusion was scrawled all over his face. finally , he rose and brushed off his shendyt.
⠀
“ what are you even talking about ? “
⠀
the only cure for this was fortunately one he was more than willing […]
⠀

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

But you keep quiet about yourself. You carry the world on your shoulders : our family , your past , your sins. And you never talk about it.

If you still think I'm too weak then fine , I just want you to talk to anyone.

⤾

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

But if he's the one responsible for that expression on his beloved's face , then perhaps he doesn't count as "good" either.

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

Every attempt brushed aside with what seems like ease. He's miserable. It's hard not to burst into tears when he looks at his husband and feels like an idiot.

His bottom lip wobbles , a hand rising to cover his face so they can't see how close to crying he is.

⤾

[— ✧.* 𓂀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺. @oasisdevoid]

⠀
he can smell the disappointment and it takes much out of him not to scoff in offence. he’s used to disappointing people by now , even just by existing sometimes.
⠀
he does not answer beau’s first question. obviously he had greeted them. he may […]
⠀

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

If Seth struggles to communicate , it must be because their wife isn't trustworthy enough. If they don't feel safe , it has to be because he's not strong enough.

“ I want to be the wife you deserve. ”

He thinks Seth deserves the world and everything good in it.

⤾

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

Already moving to stand up despite the great effort it takes. He knows that without him , most of his family would forget to eat for ages.

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

“ Did you greet our children ? You were out all night , after all. ” It's a factual statement , but the way Beau's gaze drifts to the floor shows there's more to the words than fact.

There's hurt behind his voice. When was the last time they parted on such negative terms ?

⤾

[— ✧.* 𓂀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺. @oasisdevoid]

⠀
he already knows. it’s difficult to hide much from a sha. so , he reaches out , just to stroke the backs of his fingers against beau’s arm , as if that would soothe the pain.
⠀
this isn’t as bad as he’d imagined. not yet , anyway.
⠀
he remains […]
⠀

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

Is it worse that he doesn't seem angry ? Beau doesn't flinch away from their touch. There's only an air of disappointment both with himself and his husband.

“ Have you eaten anything ? I can make something quickly. ” Even after everything , he wants to care.

⤾

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

He buries the discomfort until he's sitting up fully , arms wrapped protectively around his belly.

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

The lack of response doesn't seem promising in his mind.

Beau attempts to push himself up from his reclined position , biting at his lip to hold back the groan that threatens to escape. Sitting like this for hours has made a mess of his muscles.

⤾

[— ✧.* 𓂀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺. @oasisdevoid]

⠀
he nods but he says nothing when beau awakens. he’s secretly glad he didn’t have to wait too long.
⠀
anubis is usually quiet during conflict , though not necessarily avoidant of it. seth thought that perhaps it was due to the same paralysing fear […]
⠀

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

Finally daylight meets his irises as he slowly blinks. His gaze searches and warms when it sees Seth waiting , only to cool again as memories from the previous day return.

“ Good morning , ” he offers.

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

It's a slow process for his eyes to open again. The furrow in his brow lessens , the first sign that he'll wake soon.

His hand reaches for a blanket that isn't there , so used to sleeping in their shared bed that he doesn't even remember falling asleep on the couch.

⤾

[— ✧.* 𓂀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺. @oasisdevoid]

⠀
don’t these sillies know their pretences do not necessarily protect , but instead inflict hurt ? well , seth does , but he doesn’t know how to stop himself. he’s not used to having someone on his team.
⠀
the guilt conflicts with the urge to keep […]
⠀

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

Well , something like this happens and it feels like it's all reverted back.

Maybe that's what hurt his feelings most. Thinking that even with all his love , it wasn't enough for Seth to truly feel safe. )

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

( if only he'd been awake to hear it , that apology might've softened his heart. It'd taken a lot to pretend to be okay after Seth had walked away. Seeing the man who loved so turn had broken a piece of his heart.

It's difficult to be someone so in tune with his emotions.
⤾

[— ✧.* 𓂀 𝗼𝗳 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺. @oasisdevoid]

⠀
( he snuck in from the kitchen and set his eyes upon his beau , expression unreadable. still , he wasn’t hard—hearted enough to leave him to a restless sleep that he induced. seth knelt down at the side of the sofa , placing his hand upon the head of […]
⠀

[Pαɾαɱσυɾ ᘻ @ComposedAllure]

⤹

Especially when he's married to another man who seems to feel so much , but struggles to express it all.

All Beau wants is for Seth to feel comfortable enough to express even the ugliest parts , at least with him. And every time if feels like there's progress. . .

⤾