Kam

[Daniel Tosh @itsDannyTosh]

Twenty years ago, we had Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope. Now we have no jobs, no cash, and no hope. Please, don't let Kevin Bacon die.

[Kam @confederatekam]

Stuffing my face and going to bed

[Life Quotes! 🍀 @GirlsNoteBook]

Girl friends are like bluetooth, if you stay close they stay connected, and if you go away they find new devices.

[Men's Humor @MensHumor]

Karma is like a rubber-band: it can only stretch so far before it comes back and smacks you in the face. #Truth

[out of context things @TheComedyHumor]

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the middle ones for you.

[Men's Humor @MensHumor]

Slide down a Slip-And-Slide while it isn't wet and you'll understand why foreplay is so important.

[Men's Humor @MensHumor]

There needs to be another day between Sunday and Monday.

[Men's Humor @MensHumor]

Grocery stores need a "1 case of beer" check out line.

[I'm Drunk @DrunkPrblmz]

I would just like to take a moment to apologize to God for using his name in vein so many times today while playing call of duty.

[Men's Humor @MensHumor]

❒ Single. ❒ Taken. ✔ Doesn't matter, I’m awesome.

[Words @wordstionary]

My sex life is like a Ferrari... I don't have a damn Ferrari.

[Kam @confederatekam]

Long week in the field, gonna climb in bed and try to find a deer or two tomorrow.