Constantapples

Commit tax fraud.

[ZachInMilwaukee @ZachInMillioke]

This is literally all I can think about whenever I see her name pop up

[Cat Damon @CornOnTheGoblin]

[police sketch artist interrupts me] large naturals?

[c2dogma @c2dogma]

April 30th -- is there something special about it?
#metalgearsolid #mgs2

[metal gear facts @MetalGearFacts1]

Do you know what day it is today?

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

a little too real for me jibjab hot dog

[Tristone (KO-FI COMMS OPEN!) @OocTristone]

Looking through my hard drive and I found a mario 64 romhack I made when I was 15 years old

[octopus/caveman @octopuscaveman]

i just wanna
drive my truck
Date my truck
Kiss my truck
Fuck my truck
Get my truck pregnant
Get a discreet abortion for my truck
Continue to be publicly very anti truck abortion because I’ve made it a really big deal and I might lose fans if they found out…

[NRG 森 @sen_ebooks]

I have some very good and also Chinese news for you

[:( @mostnormalwoman]

My nonbinary children tiramisu and bok choy

[The Brohioan @TheBrohioan]

Oh I'm Alex Honnold. I'm the first person to free solo El Cap. I won an Oscar. I climbed Tepei 101 with no ropes live on Netflix and the wind exposed my chiseled abs to the world. Fuck you.

[The Ghost of Mild Springs 🥪 @JEllulz]

This signals the official end of Toyotathon

[𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝 𝕳𝖔𝖔𝖕 𝕵𝖔𝖍𝖓. 𝕭 𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝 @Hoop_JohnB]

I do feel bad for my eraserhead baby pipe sometimes. His existence is torture.

[Ron Iver @ronnui_]

Was playing D&D and started flirting with the tavern keeper to get some info and at a certain point I realized I was just dirty talking with my buddy Ben

[user @user84829272]

Basic Costco members should not be allowed to look Executive Members in the eyes