mart 🦢

♓️♍️♌️

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

am i going to be 80 and still chewing off my hangnails or do we think that’ll stop at some point

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

can everyone collectively agree to never call it the gulf of america😭

[Natalie @jbfan911]

omg…….

[Gülce @exitsenses]

Wearing a low cut top as a flat chested woman is like here’s my heart beating I guess

[my Rep is an insurrectionist @josefine_wi]

I’m sobbing😭💔

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

fav thing ab teaching 5th grade is when one of the kids calls me over to check their drawing and ask “mrs. s am i cooked?” and i can respond “no this is such a slay good job”

[Tim Walz @Tim_Walz]

Kamala Harris and I are both gun owners.

We’re not going to take away your Second Amendment rights — we’re going to prevent your kids from getting shot at school.

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

if i had a nickel for every time a mosquito bit my forehead, i would have at least a dollar by now

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

wearing a bathing suit in public makes me feel like i should have tomatoes thrown at me

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

i think that the “whole body deoderant” is propaganda honestly like lume is being shoved down my throat and i just don’t get it

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

tried to defrost chicken and literally cooked it completely i hate my life

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

if i see one more really cute bob im at risk of making a decision 😩

[mani @ImaniShante]

I wanna be nicer and less reactive but “stupid bitch” just rolls off the tongue

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

in such a good mood that i got up and jumped around wtf

[Emily Miller @emily_f_miller]

If you’re looking for something actually worth celebrating this Fourth of July you’re in luck because I have come across some incredible news: IT’S THE CAESAR SALAD CENTENNIAL. Caesar and fries crowd - this is our moment. Don the green on 7/4. It’s only right.

[mart 🦢 @cornhusklover]

this is what teaching is like, for anyone that was wondering lmao

[☔ @Whotfismick]

when I'm already in an irritable mood and someone decides to have zero common sense around me