Ryan Brookshire

🎹 MD 🎸 writer 🥸 performr 🌙 impostr 🌴 LA 🦉 Sing Out, Louise! @ UCB 🎭 THEE Improvised Musical @ Elysian 🤠 Georgia Tennessee

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

There are two kinds of people in the world: people who finish what they start

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

Ironically, Frank Sinatra grew to hate "My Way" but had to keep giving the people what they wanted. The so-called Chairman of the Board, like some minimum wage Burger King employee, essentially said Fine, have it YOUR way

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

i used to have pet peeves

then they grew huge, took over the house, & put *me* in the crate!

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

Life is what happens while you're busy avoiding other plans

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

Haunt (2019) alternate titles:

👹 Texas Chainsaw Maze-acre
👹 Children of the Korn
👹 A Quiet Face
👹 Clan's Labyrinth
👹 Indiana Jones & the Temple of Goon
👹 Hostel 2: Electric Boogaloo
👹 The Haunting of Hell House LLC
👹 Insane Clown Posse
👹 Face/Off

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

https://t.co/Pt79i7GbSL

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

Come make up songs with me! I'm teaching a 6-week Intro to Musical Improv—with a class show—at the lovely @LyricHyperion. Sunday afternoons starting August 18, all levels welcome! Thank you @fernandoafunes' The Lyric Hyperion & Glendale Room Training Center 🎹🎭🎶💖

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

Something's Gotta Give As Good As Is It Gets Complicated. Mamma Mia!

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

(in your funkiest George Clinton voice) my pheromones give her feral moans

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

thirst traps don't work on me, i'm a fucking camel (i hump myself)

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

most people don't know this but Wayne's World is actually a sequel to the far superior Wayne's Park

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

coworker described my vibe as "the disaster movie scientist no one listens to" 💀

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

@lasertheboy you're welcome! to help me try!

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

I'm gonna leave this world like I entered it: kicking & screaming & covered in goo

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

@lasertheboy I agree! I have no money!

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

I'm a financier

I see-yer finances

I don't have any, but I see yers

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

BREAKING: Podcaster starts second podcast to work through divorce caused by first podcast

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

me personally? I'd rather be left alone in the woods with a man than a bear. I'd kill the man: one less man in the woods! #ally

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

Jk, callbacks are a rarity for us all! Also, this isn't actually in reference to anything specific, I just like it ok!

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

Always a callback, never a call ☎️😞

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

@lasertheboy MEET MY DEMANDS!

[Ryan Brookshire @correctbehavior]

I have the patients of a saint

(I kidnapped a bunch of patients from St. Jude hospital)