Cosmic Matrix Podcast

A podcast w/ @lauramatsue & @veilofreality about spirituality, psychology, esotericism, inner work & more

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“Memory is like a thread to our greater depth. Why do people not follow it? It’s like the way the occult is portrayed in horror films, vampires and evil magicians possessing people, rather than a genuine ritualized attempt to engage higher insight or higher power.

To follow the thread to the depth of the psyche, we must be prepared to encounter whatever we come across, including that which kept us away from depth or from truth.

Long-term memory holds all sorts of things, including psychic events of real intensity, including trauma, when something was so intense it knocked your centering completely offline.

That is a psychologically pragmatic definition of trauma: something that knocked you out, on whatever level. So long-term memory is going to hold these events of psychic intensity.

This is where we encounter the memories of what we could call trauma, the pain and the loss of what happened to us.

For a deeper holistic engagement, to journey through what Jung might have called the shadow, toward some greater depth, to find your way through the darkness to the inner teacher, you have to open to all the parts of yourself that turned away from reality because it was unbearable.

And that includes acknowledging both events in this life that have been deeply painful or shaped you, and the subtle resonances within past memory.”

-Mark Jones

Episode 174 – Uranus in Gemini: A Turning Point in Human Consciousness w/ Mark Jones

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“The dark night of the soul is often precipitated by a crisis: a breakup, a death, a loss of some sort, a betrayal. This crisis eventually leads to a loss of meaning, where you can’t feel joy in the aspects of your life that used to fulfill you.

This is different from a typical grieving process or temporary experience of sadness. The dark night of the soul strikes something deeper and shakes the core of your existence.

The dark night of the soul relates to a process of “purification.” You are being purified in the fire of darkness. The loss of meaning that accompanies the dark night can eventually lead you to reexamine the way you have lived your life until now.

Although this loss of meaning can be extremely uncomfortable, if you stay with it, it can also lead you to a profound transformation.

The deep transformation that the dark night of the soul can offer is that it can liberate you from many of the false parts of yourself to live a more authentic life. You must lose the false self to find the true self. It can often take months or years for this process to complete itself.

If you are going through a dark night of the soul, you must have faith that the darkness has a purpose. We live in a world that aggressively tries to “fix” dark nights of the soul, and if you try and make the dark night go away prematurely and force yourself to be “happy” again, it can stall and prolong the process.

Instead, engage with your dark night fully and use it as an opportunity to explore your internal life. Be encouraged by the idea that on the other side of the dark night of the soul is a new, more authentic, deeper relationship to yourself, to others, and to life itself.

The dark night helps you let go of all your false selves so you can step into a more authentic version of yourself. It also helps us reconnect with God.”
-Laura Matsue

Episode 124, Part 2 – A Guide Through the Dark Night of the Soul

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“Whatever happens in your life, the question is, what is it trying to tell you? If there's a breakdown, if there is destruction, there's a bigger process unfolding that works in your favor if you can surrender to it.

When you see how it is reflected in your psyche, you begin to understand that there is a deeper call that cannot be answered or resolved through rational thinking or problem solving by saying, “Oh, I just need to get rid of this. I just want to feel better.”

This process requires an internal transformation, and that is what shadow work and individuation are all about. It's coming into alignment with something deeper and truer within yourself and your soul.

The crisis we experience is like a dismemberment or destruction of the false ego personality, and with it goes the false life that many people have been living.

It may not feel like it works in your favor. Speaking out of my own experience, it sucks. But if you stick with it and don't fall into the victim/blame trap or escapism or try to distract yourself and avoid the whole process, it’s a rite of passage and a transformation where a connection to the true self is being born.”

-Bernhard Guenther

Episode 146 – Soul Purpose vs. Ego Desires: Finding Your True Path

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“Holding the tension of opposites is what Carl Jung said was necessary when working with polarization. To not identify with either side or the opposites will create friction and then offer a third path.

Yet, so many people literally just flip flop between extreme forms of ego identification these days. You’re either a woke leftist or you’re a conservative Christian. You’re either on my side or against it.

But there’s a distinct group that is arising who don’t identify with any group, -ism, or movement right now. You don’t have to fall into another group identification once you’ve lost your connection to one side.

You don’t need to be one way or another. You don’t need to fall into another tribal identity once you’ve been exiled from the one you were in. Instead, you can instead use this feeling of not belonging to the current culture to discover the truth of who you really are.

By discovering a third way, you break free of tribalism and offer a different path than the extreme opposites.

You bring back unique gifts from discovering who you really are, which you can pour into the world to disrupt the current culture. A truly individuated soul is a tribe of one.”
-Laura Matsue

Related to Episode 130, Part 2 – How Can We Heal This Polarized World?

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“When someone comes back from a ceremony announcing they are “chosen,” that they have received “special downloads,” that they have a new name and a mission to save humanity, they’re selling the same narcissism as someone showing off money, cars, and status, dressed up in a new costume.

They’re bypassing what humans actually need right now: the thing that would truly change their lives and relationships at a grounded, fundamental level, that helps humanity: a healthier ego (not an inflated one).

A healthier ego, not in the popular sense of arrogance, self-importance, or the need for attention, but healthy ego strength in the psychological sense: the foundation of a functional, healthy self.

A healthy ego is grounded in reality. It means being able to look at yourself clearly and honestly, not through the lens of how special you are.

A lot of people have asked me, “What's wrong with being special?” And my response is, “Well, what within you needs to be special? Yes, we are all unique expressions of God, but what is the need to be seen as special by others? Where is that coming from?”

-Bernhard Guenther

Episode 177 – Spiritual Awakening or Spiritual Psychosis?

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“This basket formation may be a period where we're forced to redefine what it means to be human in this age of rapidly accelerating technology. It may correspond with breakthroughs in artificial intelligence and increasing debates around freedom, privacy, and the relationship between human beings and technology.

The higher expression of this basket is: how can we use technology in the service of our humanity? Or with Neptune-Pluto, can we keep our spirituality grounded in psychological maturity?

The shadow expression is going to be fragmentation and increased technological acceleration while we lose our connection to what makes us human.

You can see this in the collective shadow material that leads to ideological possession and collective delusions. And through replacing authentic human experiences with synthetic substitutes like AI friendships and relationships.

It's a very interesting period we're in, because it's not just about which technologies will emerge, but about what kind of human consciousness is going to meet and use them.

The most important development of these times is not necessarily just political, social, or technological, but rather what we do to transform consciousness itself and how that reflects the new era we're entering.”

-Laura Matsue

Episode 178 – The Astrology Of Civilization’s Next Turning Point: The Basket Formation

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“From an occult and esoteric perspective, thinking you’re awake while lost in delusion is more dangerous than being asleep without pretending to be awake. Overestimating your level of consciousness and inflating your identity through labels like starseed, gridworker, lightworker, or indigo creates a false sense of specialness.

This blocks the humility needed for sincere, grounded psycho-spiritual work, which is the foundation of real awakening. Your true soul-being is not identified with any labels; only the ego is.

The spiritual ego is harder to break than the ego of someone still asleep in the matrix. This is the root of spiritual narcissism, which is becoming increasingly common.

The illusion of being special or chosen becomes a mask for unresolved childhood wounds, insecurity, and unhealed trauma.

Whether it’s claiming to be an ambassador for ET races, a chosen contactee for the Galactic Federation, a starseed on a special mission, or a self-righteous reborn Christian convinced they have special access to God, it all feeds the same inflation.

Any identity that reinforces specialness and attachment to spiritual labels becomes a trap. It also opens the door to hostile forces. This is the Luciferian temptation.”
-Bernhard Guenther

Related to Episode 177, Part 2 – Spiritual Awakening or Spiritual Psychosis?

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“One ​of the themes I find most important, ​and exemplary of Neptune-Pluto, is the integration of the psychological and spiritual. Psychospiritual ​is ​the ​perfect ​word ​for ​Neptune ​and ​Pluto. ​Pluto: ​psycho and Neptune: ​spiritual.

I feel this is the opportunity with this Neptune-Pluto sextile, because without psychological work, spirituality and religion can easily become ways of suppressing what is unconscious and wounded within us.

We can use our spiritual beliefs to avoid our pain, deny our shadow, and project what's disowned within ourselves onto someone out there. This dynamic has fueled countless religious conflicts throughout history. ​We can see this today in the rise of dogmatic religion and the potential for religious or holy wars that could arise from this.

If we focus only on psychology without spirituality, we explore the depths without connecting to the heights. We look at our wounds, traumas, and unconscious, but we never connect them to a larger sense of meaning or relationship to God. Most of us and humanity need both.

We're also going to witness an unconscious expression of this aspect. We're going to see the collective unconscious, the collective shadow, become fuel for more mass delusions and collective hysteria.

But it is an opportunity for a transformation of consciousness, and that's what will change the world. But if we're unwilling to look within, face our depths, confront our shadows, the doors of perception, Neptune, will remain clouded by unconscious material, to borrow the phrase popularized by Huxley.

So this opportunity before us is not technological, political, or social; it's really psychological and spiritual. We're entering a period of profound potential psychospiritual transformation.

This is not going to be the dominant story of the masses; we have this splitting in consciousness. There will be people who become more lost and disconnected from themselves, especially as technology takes over, but it will be an underlying theme for those actively engaged in their own evolution of consciousness.”

-Laura Matsue

Episode 178 – The Astrology Of Civilization’s Next Turning Point: The Basket Formation

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“Anyone who irritates or annoys you, who keeps “living rent-free” in your head, who you keep talking shit about, gossiping about, calling all kinds of names, especially through oversimplified “all bad” perceptions and over-generalized labels, who you talk smack about on social media and can’t let go of, is a mirror of your own shadow.

It is the part of yourself you deny, avoid, and only see in the person who irritates you. It is unconscious, and by its very nature, your ego personality will justify, rationalize, and defend the projections.

These projections will often be supported by others who carry the same shadow and engage in the loosh feast, making you feel better and justified in this shadow dance. This is the basis of mob cancel culture and, on occult levels, what entities feed off.

Retrieving projections is difficult because it feels so much better and more justified to project, especially for the wounded inner child that was never seen or given the love it needed. Unconscious envy and jealousy are also the basis for most negative shadow projections.

Retrieving projections can be painful, yet also deeply humbling. You begin to realize, on an embodied, visceral level, that what irritated and annoyed you, and what you disliked the most in the other person, is you staring back at yourself, begging to be integrated.

Shadow integration leads you to your true Self and frees your daimon, your creative spirit, talents, and gifts you never realized you had. Without it, there is no individuation, no love, and no awakening.”

-Bernhard Guenther

Episode 95, Part 2 - Learn How to Do Shadow Work on Social Media

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“We're at the very beginning, the seed moment of the Saturn-Neptune cycle, the start of a much longer 36-year cycle, which is unique because it occurs at 0 degrees Aries, the beginning of the zodiac. Which is why many astrologers view this as a profound reset point, not just another Saturn-Neptune conjunction.

These Saturn-Neptune transits can be a big reality check because they confront us with mortality, the illusions we've been holding, the ways we've been lying to ourselves, or an old dream that can no longer sustain us has to die.

I've noticed this process can get distorted in either direction; we can go too far with Saturn and become cynical, depressed, pessimistic, or black-pilled, a very negative, nihilistic, hopeless worldview. Or we can go too far into Neptune and become increasingly detached from reality, lost in fantasy, ideologies, wishful thinking, or delusions.

The challenge with the Saturn-Neptune conjunction, which we're still working on, is finding integration between the two. Saturn gives the form, and Neptune gives the vision.

Saturn and Neptune can help us ground dreams in reality, which means we have to be willing to face reality. Many of us are being presented with an opportunity for a new beginning, a new version of ourselves, or a new relationship with our purpose.

So the question with the Saturn-Neptune conjunction is: who are we when this old dream falls apart, or this old order collapses? What remains when the identities we once relied on dissolve? And how can we become more aligned with this new self that is trying to emerge?”

-Laura Matsue

Episode 178 – The Astrology Of Civilization’s Next Turning Point: The Basket Formation

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