Chris Payne

Barrister in London. Law, politics, gin, poker, board games, taekwondo. All views my own. RTs not endorsements.

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

@NHSMillion The secret is not to worry about what people who can't spell 5 letter words think.

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

GRATEFUL ODDITIES OF COURT SECURITY
Security: Take a sip of that water please.
Me: What about this steaming cup of hot brown liquid?
Security: Nah, you're fine.

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

I learnt a lot about hole punches today. How and why they work, and the important role a small little washer plays in their functioning. Exciting stuff.

In other news: WTB functioning hole punch

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

Forget about me, I live at MKC Station now. I have joined a tribe who dwell on Platform 4. They have accepted me as one of their own. It is a simple life, though theirs is strange god: the tribe appear to worship a board with orange light-up lettering upon it #traindelays

[Adam Wagner KC @AdamWagner1]

Somebody looked up ‘pyrrhic victory’ in the dictionary and this tweet is all that’s there https://t.co/VaMrEvQ5n3

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

@JoshuaRozenberg @JohnHyde1982 It's nice to see press censorship alive and well in a democratic society. Plus if you credible journalist types were let in the government of the day might be held to account and no-one wants that!

What's that? Everyone wants that? Oh...

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

@Barristerblog Forced socialising: You WILL talk and you WILL like each other!

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

This can be a subtle sign your staff need some refresher training on the organisation's whistleblowing policy #ukemplaw

'Whistleblower' taped to chair and gagged - https://t.co/y74ygsA2F4

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

I appear to have acquired a sore throat overnight #excellent

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

Disagreement with a puddle earlier. Puddle won.

#trousershoppingtime

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

TYPO OF THE DAY
Spotted in a court order:
"...subject to treasonable objections." #law #typo #thebar

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

Favourite mythical creature? Has to be a one day ET hearing actually completed in a day #ukemplaw #lawjokes #unfunnylawjokes

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

Thought walking 20 mins to court might be quite pleasant. I can no longer feel my face. #cold

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

Crikey. Never knew 25 min train Paddington to Reading was so much - £47.40 return (though can be cheaper buying separate singles) outrageous! #greattrainrobbery

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

Great social organised by the @emplawyers great to meet some new people and, more importantly, best olives I've had in a very, very long time #emplaw #thebar

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

@IMSpardagus @phatsilk_qc So, so true - always think about what you would argue in the other side's shoes. Unless you've found some niche unreported Court of Appeal case from 1863 then your opponent has probably already thought of the point!

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

First trip to the provinces since qualifying! #nonewstoreportthen #thebar

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

@CrimBarrister84 Surely time for some exaggerated gesticulating to keep warm?

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

I'm wearing a scarf AND a snood today. You might think that's overkill... and you'd be right #freezing #whatisthesun

[Chris Payne @Counsel_Chris]

@BarristerSecret Never came into being (I think) but David Cameron's proposal to bring in legislation preventing him from raising income tax rates as opposed to, y'know, just not raising income tax rates.