mike trout 🏒🧩🦍

jess, 24, saosin lovebot, stars/red wings cheerleader, bootleg doodlebop, pneumonia superstar, valgavoth criminal, my chud son @catrick328 | 4-22 ❤️

[kanoa @heelbitee]

accidentally became important at work n its ruining my life

[mike trout 🏒🧩🦍 @countingflies]

need 3 molars taken out and a root canal lol and they don't do them at this office + their main office is booked til august what if I died

[mike trout 🏒🧩🦍 @countingflies]

about to get at least one molar taken out my teeth are so embarrassing and the dentist is gonna be so mad at meeee

[mike trout 🏒🧩🦍 @countingflies]

about to get at least one molar taken out my teeth are so embarrassing and the dentist is gonna be so mad at meeee

[michelle @fluffygirlpaws]

you're a sick fuck for what you did to those kids

[mike trout 🏒🧩🦍 @countingflies]

Filling popped out at work so now I need 2 teeth extracted instead of one , I'm going to [REDACTED]

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

@hippojuicefilm You mean crack head faggot. And all your gym pictures with your greased up muscles are really hot Royce.

[javi @IAmTheVibes]

Girlfriend doesn’t even tell me she’s hungry anymore she just tells me if she doesn’t eat soon she’s “going to become evil”

[limpkin @acealeam]

girlfriend called... DECLINE! busy whore! busy with my CREEK

[Dave Meltzer @davemeltzerWON]

Must be incorrect. Pentagon has always been Cero Miedo,

[mike trout 🏒🧩🦍 @countingflies]

@abbyataraxy sep 22 at steelhouse with knuckle puck and another support that's tba!!

[mike trout 🏒🧩🦍 @countingflies]

I have to pick between nevertel at the waiting room and bilmuri at the steelhouse . man .

[mike trout 🏒🧩🦍 @countingflies]

cat who is going to HELL (got his claw stuck in my hand and now it stings like a bitch)

[nicole ruiz @nwilliams030]

Gm Bryan Johnson eating food that he wouldn’t normally for the sake of hospitality and stepping into the love other people were trying to show him is very beautiful actually

[amore @aamoreteric]

bc we’re supposed to have septum piercings

[YUH 🫟 @__jahlil__]

My fav jersey shore lore is that Gym, Tan, Laundry was their code term for picking up Cocaine.

[rrat @Autism_Squeaks]

this is more or less how ancient greek philosophy worked

[𝒢𝒾𝓁𝒷ℯ𝓇𝓉 @AbakpaJob]

Was having a pretty bad morning but then I went to pet my cat and she did a little hop to meet my hand halfway so it's all good now

[lady brett ashley @margebertha]

no yeah I have sexual urges

[່͏ @niggaayaoi]

That shit look like a brain eating fungus

[chance @chance1084059]

today chance got a letter stating he is officially an emotional support animal. today’s emotional support included knocking over mommy’s pills at 6 am and yelling about it

[horse dentist @equine__dentist]

*stands on your porch like a low poly seagull*