Mayochup Saucysauce

She don't take no shine to you at all, she'll just kick your ass at pinball and make you buy the wine.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

"The best defense is a good offense, and I intend to start offending right now."

Captain James T. Kirk,
Starship Enterprise

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

Low key think I just waited on Wilson Contreras at Huey’s 🫣

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@sjakksnakk @MacronSports @Norselab @VonDoren @shadesofnorway @Fantasy__Chess @Sjakkforbundet Odin

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

This is a really fun dry run for the four horsemen!

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

Yo guys, I missed Twitter…figured I’d pop back and catch up with the gang!

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@pepboysauto Nah I'm good on that. Last time y'all sent me coupons like that was going to fix it. Don't need a discount at a business I won't support ever again. You guys just keep up the shoddy work over there.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

Ayooooo fuck @pepboysauto on Park. Gave them a second shot today and scheduled and APPOINTMENT for 4:00... 5:40 rolls around and haven't heard a word so I rolled back in. They hadn't even started, despite guaranteeing me they would be done before closing time (6:00).

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

I've already done this dance with them years ago and thought, hey, everyone has bad days. But with no apology from staff and only half assed excuses... yeah put em on blast.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@starclusterr I'm listening to the Tampa broadcasters and the rage is real.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

OH MY GOD

[Brandon Koretz @BrandonKoretz]

ALL-TIMER! #WorldSeries

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

Uh there's a fly on your head bro.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@starclusterr This is my new favorite image.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@AngieBritt Not wearing a bra is my favorite bra.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

Gonna start a service like Lyft but I only take people to and from the Pancho's in West Memphis.

Call it Pancho's Pilot.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

I feel so seen 👀

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@IntlSpaceNathan @YazooTerry Can you use an instapot?

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

A good friend of mine asked me about twitter the other day and decided to start one up. Today he text me, "I'm following you so keep it classy."

So I'd like to formally come out of twitter retirement to ask y'all about ass eating.

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@YazooTerry Was the Corona virus invented by millennials to cause the toilet paper shortage to normalize bidets to make eating ass easier??? 🤔

[Mayochup Saucysauce @cowboykillah]

@YazooTerry People keep asking me about is because I'm a millennial and I don't have answers for them. So like... do you shower first? Does everyone have a bidet?

[Kimya Dawson @mrskimyadawson]

If Seattle cops think getting hit with a half empty water bottle justifies violently attacking the entire crowd they should definitely never be the solo acoustic opener for Third Eye Blind on tour. Trust me.