Aloha amigos! This is Crazy Gobbit, a Plutonian who has come to Earth by quantum transportation. Hold your fire, friendship with Earthlings is my only desire 😈
That moment when you are in the washroom and wicket falls and you are forced to stay in the washroom. 🙈🙈
Because every Indian family turns superstitious when it is India's nail biting semifinal.
#IndvsNZ#IndiaVsNewZealand#Semifinals
He: Do you know why I like you so much?
She: No why?
He: Because I am punny, and you add an 'r' to my punny. And who doesn't like punnyr (paneer).
She: 🤦🏻♀️
She (While writing mathematical equations): Yaar this equation is so elegantly beautiful.
He: Don't worry! Come with me and then that equation will be so jealous of our equation!
She: 🤦🏻���️
How to roast like a pro 😉
1. You are so useless that even the integration constant feels useful around you.
2. You are as important to me as P is to Pneumonia.
3. You are my right hand because I am lefty.
4. Your existence matters in my life as much as "ueue" matters in "Queue".
You know you are in your late 20s 👇
1. When life treats you like tosses treat MS Dhoni
2. When you start singing Arijit's classic heart break songs but even they are like, "Bas kar yaar, rulayega kya!"
3. When you become the dad of dad jokes
4. When you start making fart jokes
Guide 101 on how to propose a foodie:
When you are oregano to my pizza,
Lemon to my margarita,
Caffeine to my coffee,
Vitamin K to my broccoli,
Aloo to my samosa,
Coconut chutney to my dosa,
Pav to my bhaji,
Toh kya karega Kazi.
When you ask your computer engineer friend to look for your lost thing:
Friend: "Running a full brain check...
Compiling results...
Result: Earphones not found
Activate advanced brain check mode?
PS: This is resource intensive and can take longer"
You: 🤦🏻♀️
@thecoderlife@talk2nit
And this is responsible for the fun date ending soon whereas a long boring meeting seems to last ten thousand years. So it's not you, it is this Gobbit witch making all this happen while smirking happily in the corner.
(4/n)
Einstein rightly said, "When you are courting a nice girl, an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red hot cinder, a second seems like an hour."
(1/n)
Me as a kid: Popeye is so cool because he eats a lot of spinach.
Me as an adult: Yaar Popeye was even cooler because he could pull off cigars while impressing all the parents.