Professional Cap-Dancer

ain't got a care in the world; but got plenty of beer

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

5'0 but when I stand on my money I'm 8'12

[matt👍 @moorhaus_]

back at Guestlist this Saturday closing things out with Muffy 😇

one of my favorite parties to dance at and play at - the GL team has built something very special and energy is really something worth experiencing

free RSVP & limited capacity 👇👇👇
https://t.co/6yrdtn6lSj

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@FonkusBonkus Missed giving head joke opportunity. Sigh

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@FonkusBonkus Literally what does this even mean

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@mytr98 Can’t believe you’re subtweeting
Me

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@kingpoopas 🤤🤤🤤

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@Deep_Jack_Bot He returns

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@speeeeves I thought that was their rendition of ‘happy birthday’

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@KingOCurry Oh grow up

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@Mr0xide @marcrebillet @LPGiobbi @Ticketmaster Broooooo I’m so pissed

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@KingOCurry This GOT me

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

PSA: getting all 3 vaccines DOES NOT make your ass fatter. DO NOT try it

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@ZamboniZealot U gave it to me for my bday 🤑

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

You know I keep that thang on me (my liver)

[limber lumber @limber_lumber]

Went out for some much needed fresh air today

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@ikilledjonbenet Lizzie I don’t believe u

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

If he uses A1 steak sauce sis he is NOT the one for you 😤

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@E7imon Hm. Sounds like liberal propaganda to me!

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

How do u mentally prepare for the return of the 17 year cicadas

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@ZamboniZealot I feel it 🐛 in my bones 🕷

[Professional Cap-Dancer @crowesmos]

@KingOCurry I will make the cicadas work for a barely liveable wage and simultaneously make them pay for healthcare