Keith Ambrose

Failed sportsman, frustrated comedian, average father and husband. Views are my own and no offence is intended!

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@LeighNYA Fabulous news Leigh. Many congratulations.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@adplacksports I’d take 3/1 on someone not on your list.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@SnookerInfo147 Six the same but Murphy and Williams instead of zhang and Carter.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@TalkingSnooker I have been watching snooker for fifty years and in the “old days” you knew as soon as a ball hit the near cushion it wouldn’t drop. Now it’s common place for balls, from tight angles, to hit the near cushion 3 or 4 inches from the angle, and still drop. Makes better TV I guess.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@MonkeyOls Hi Ol. Let me have four grand and I can make it go away.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@SkyCricket if the difference between balls and runs is 12, the batting team need 4 fours, not 3. A four will reduce the score by four, but the ball count also reduces by one, so the gain is only three. #JustSaying

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@alexelliottgolf I take part of that comment back. I was delighted to see Rory play so well but only he will know if the wedge in to the par five was a poor shot under pressure or a gust of wind. The bogey there, when Clark got a birdie was the difference.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@alexelliottgolf I would love him to win, and I hope he does, but Rory has proven too many times that he can’t perform when it matters on a Sunday. His best Sunday major rounds in recent years have been when he is out of contention. When he’s in the mix it just doesn’t happen. 73 or worse today.

[Buitengebieden @buitengebieden]

Knock out.. 😮

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@RachelS59039892 Hi Rachel. Sure thing…07967342793. Keith.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

I know I am getting old but is there anyone who can open a packet of crumpets with their bare hands?!

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@PicturesFoIder I would add 27 to 50 (=77) then take away 2 (=75)

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@waitrose I’m afraid so but the burgers were delicious and I made my own sauce, so no dramas!

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@waitrose wot no sauce!

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@qikipedia My suspicion is that it is illegal but the law turn a blind eye because they realise how much income it generates.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@qikipedia I’m not sure. I was there last year - I tasted JD in the distillery, I bought a bottle in the shop and I had a beer in the cafe in the town. I asked the waitress how come I could have a beer as I was in a “dry county” and she gave a weird answer about there being “dry” & dry.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@RevRichardColes 1979 - 1982, Sunday round, two hours work including walk to and from the newsagent, started at 50p, rose to 75p by the time I left! It used to keep me in a snack a day from the school tuck shop though!

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@SDavies348 Gout - “the pain of a thousand needles”. Naproxen is a cure. Montmorency Cherry juice every day is a prevention. You can get a bottle of cordial or get it in tablets. Can also be managed by diet. https://t.co/rlzJUxJFDx is a good source of info.

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@sarajcox I used to work in the automotive industry and I had a colleague who was called to a “very important strategic meeting” with a Japanese car manufacturer in Tokyo. 20 hours there, 20 hours back and you’ve guessed it, meeting lasted 20 minutes!

[Keith Ambrose @Curtly07]

@ally_ambrose3 I think you should change West Virginia, Mountain Mama to Rutland County, multum in parvo