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Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
TV, movies, sports, home repairs.
Murca
Joined March 2009
1.7K
Following
2.5K
Followers
161
Posts
dadjokes
retweeted
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 3 years ago
@elonmusk
if you want this account you can have it for $69,420
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 3 years ago
@elonmusk
if you want this account you can have it for $69,420
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 4 years ago
✌️
worms cited
@christapeterso
over 4 years ago
people say let sleeping dogs lie. i say let them tell the truth
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 4 years ago
✅
Who to follow
U𝕏 Jobs
@IA_UXJOBS
Volunteer curation by a group of UX’ers since 2009 // We Live TO BOOST your Jobs,Portfolios & Good News "@ us" // https://t.co/TZRP0mkcbb // #uxjobs #UX #UXD #Design
Dad Jokes by Dad
@dadjokesbydad
Here are my sesquipedalic, Quintessentially Quaint to Completely Corny, Queries & ,,, Quips?!
Shannon Thornton
@ShannonThornt_n
ACTOR. 🌸 #PVALLEY on STARZ. I like donuts. IG @shannonthornt_n
dadjokes
retweeted
Bella 🐶🦴🍪🌻🔆
@PuppyWineMom
over 4 years ago
My grandfather got addicted to Viagra. Nobody is taking it harder than my grandma
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 5 years ago
You expect me to believe my son dried these tomatoes?
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 5 years ago
(Pointing at the 4k Netflix Yule Log on my 55” Hisense Roku flatscreen) Careful! It’s hot!
dadjokes
retweeted
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 11 years ago
Date night tonight!
dadjokes
retweeted
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
almost 11 years ago
What did the psychiatrist say to the man dressed entirely in Saran Wrap? Sir, I can clearly see your nuts.
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 5 years ago
I have a Theremin, but I haven’t touched it in years.
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 5 years ago
😬
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
about 6 years ago
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 7 years ago
I’m just resting my eyes.
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 7 years ago
@michiokaku
Why did the sun go to college if it already had a million degrees?
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 7 years ago
Re:
#Theranos
- you had me at blood and Siemens
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 7 years ago
The moon has 1/6th of the Earth’s gravity...and refuses to give it back!
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 7 years ago
This year, Rick Moranis will come out of retirement to make “Honey I Shrunk the President” and bring the whole nation together.
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 7 years ago
🎊 Happy You Near! 🎊
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
over 7 years ago
@HuffPost
Good one! https://t.co/gUcxqUy5H9
Dad Jokes
@dadjokes
almost 10 years ago
Being a dad is great because you get to ruin someone from scratch!
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