dagbert

play stupid games, win stupid prizes

[dagbert @dagbert]

c'mon, how epic is this longread https://t.co/iRH1GnFkFu

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@jamesdshotwell ...but when do we get a @jamesdshotwell list of list tweets, ranked 🧐

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@jamesdshotwell not gonna chime in with my own list, only with the observation that there are way too few tracks from ‘warning’ in this thread. blood, sex and booze ftw

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@nealrogers paging @Mikel_Jollett...

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too bad I can’t put my cheat days on @Strava 🤷🏻‍♂️ (mezcal and ice cream for dessert)

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@davepell BLUB BLUB BLUB

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not all news is bad https://t.co/wZGR4rdGpZ

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D.icks https://t.co/dMJ7FTmR58 R.uining E.verything. Someone oughta put that on a shirt

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now you’re gonna tell me millennials are killing the divorce rate 🤷🏻‍♂️

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fallen kingdom was 'the phantom menace' of jurassic park. so was the other jurassic world I guess

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I’d just line to state for the record that the “money mailer” is in fact *not* “like getting money in the mail” 😑

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@jamesdshotwell Dammit, another banger:
5) Fatally Yours
4) Blue in the Face
3) Private Eye
2) Radio
1) Radio

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@jamesdshotwell Shit, you got me:
5) Sins
4) This is Life
3) Surfaced
2) No One's Gonna Need You More
1) Permanent Rain

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@JoeLewis1989 @TourofUtah they’re just following @TeamSky’s pledge to pass that plastic to the roadside 🙄

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if you’re bringing a wireless mouse to the coffee shop, you’re part of the problem

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my finest work yet

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@Tommy_McDermott you tell ‘em where to stick that frisbee

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all our heroes are dead, instagram is broken, and our enemies are in power 🤷🏻‍♂️

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@Tommy_McDermott I’d buy this print

[dagbert @dagbert]

I'll be damned, they found it
https://t.co/JUUgwFM6KD