@ogbeni_ceejay Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
Philippians 4:7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Mind you, this applies to someone whom you have vetted and done due diligence. One who has shown they are able and capable of receiving & giving grace. If your person doesn’t meet those conditions they are likely to take that grace for granted and treat you like a door mat.
Marriage (or any positive romantic relationship) is sustained by grace, not emotional thrill. It is this grace that births patience and positive communication. You can have everything but if you don't have grace, you do not belong to the institution.
I would define grace here as the "internalised belief that your partner - the person you vetted and chose to be with - would not maliciously subject you to harm".
This is not to say that they won't do you wrong. But that this wrong will never be intentionally malicious in its manifestation. I should be able to trust that you mean me no harm, even in the errors that you make.
Only then can we focus on the problem, and not you vs me.
Unfortunately, the problem many make is in defining their grace through the partners. That it is the responsibility of the partner to make them gracious. Or trusting. But truth is, this disposition should exist long before the partner comes along.
This thing of he or she brings it out of me is a lazy attempt at delegation of duty. You should be those things before the partner arrives. The partner should complement what already exists, and has been trained for years. Otherwise, you will be postponing the inevitable. You are either gracious or not, and it will manifest overtime in how you treat and engage your partner.
The initial rays of romance tends to conceal a lot, but who you inherently are will inform the direction of the relationship. It will always prevail. So before you were treating your man right, how were you treating the gate man? Before you were kind to your wife, how were you addressing your mother?
@XivTroy Mind you, this applies to someone whom you have vetted and done due diligence. One who has shown they are able and capable of receiving & giving grace. If your person doesn’t meet those conditions they are likely to take that grace for granted and treat you like a door mat.
Marriage (or any positive romantic relationship) is sustained by grace, not emotional thrill. It is this grace that births patience and positive communication. You can have everything but if you don't have grace, you do not belong to the institution.
I would define grace here as the "internalised belief that your partner - the person you vetted and chose to be with - would not maliciously subject you to harm".
This is not to say that they won't do you wrong. But that this wrong will never be intentionally malicious in its manifestation. I should be able to trust that you mean me no harm, even in the errors that you make.
Only then can we focus on the problem, and not you vs me.
Unfortunately, the problem many make is in defining their grace through the partners. That it is the responsibility of the partner to make them gracious. Or trusting. But truth is, this disposition should exist long before the partner comes along.
This thing of he or she brings it out of me is a lazy attempt at delegation of duty. You should be those things before the partner arrives. The partner should complement what already exists, and has been trained for years. Otherwise, you will be postponing the inevitable. You are either gracious or not, and it will manifest overtime in how you treat and engage your partner.
The initial rays of romance tends to conceal a lot, but who you inherently are will inform the direction of the relationship. It will always prevail. So before you were treating your man right, how were you treating the gate man? Before you were kind to your wife, how were you addressing your mother?
Saul became a new man not by receiving prophecy, but by prophesying to himself. Don’t wait for a word; be the voice. Speak over your life. Declare over your future. The power to transform your life is in your mouth.
#thisIsthat#EmmanuelMakandiwa#RuthEmmanuelMakandiwa