Dale Shafer

[Sevyn🍂 @sevynxox]

I got the COVID vaccine while I was breastfeeding my newborn, and now 5.5 years later his teeth are starting to fall out.

[💎 @foreeeeeal]

My kink is when you're eating a pint of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and your spoon hits a massive boulder of cookie dough that you then pry out like an archaeologist on the dig of a lifetime

[Colleen @Coll3enG]

my coworker just asked that I tweet “Only button that needs to be on the microwave is the +30 seconds one” says it’s gonna do “numbies”

[Karen McGee @karenmotherof2]

German fans tomorrow needing a new home after suffering a colossal defeat in front of the whole world

[Cedar You @our_decay]

Watched a cute animal video that I knew to be AI all the way through

[Parody/Spoof/Satire Clips @NoContextSpoof]

It’s Pride Month!! You know what that means:

[zoë rose bryant @zoerosebryant]

how these noah kahan and kacey musgraves album drops back-to-back have me

[anna !!! :)) 🇵🇸🌸✨🌸🇵🇸 @frogs4girls]

“have you ever seen 30 rock” buddy i’ve seen way more than 30 rocks

[jackantonoff @jackantonoff]

you caught you?

[F@gHag (Global) @missmaamshe]

Picking up a new shift at the #TeamDawn Bar & Grill

[kfly ibrahimobitch @drnkngshmpn]

"vagueposting" it's called a fucking subtweet and was the backbone of this website before you idiots got here

[Dale Shafer @dalmasha]

Great to find out I'm in the wrong tax bracket to go to #LA28

[Annie Agar @AnnieAgar]

steelers defense showing up everywhere but on the field.

[ally 🦋✨🎧⸆⸉ @ally_sheehan]

just putting it out there for no reason at all that i am available to fly anywhere in the world and great at keeping a secret

[Dale Shafer @dalmasha]

It's mine

[lena. | NADIA DAY! @trashlenaa]

this is probably someone's challengers

[Dale Shafer @dalmasha]

Even a broken clock is right twice a day. Well this specific time only once.

[Dexerto @Dexerto]

Donald Trump is signing an executive order to end the push for paper straws