The Ombudsman

Teacher of English. Husband and father.

[Eric @amerix]

A man's end month:

"Daddy, new shoes for church. Mummy said the one I wanted was 2,000."

"Hello dear, also, don't forget to deposit Ray's fees tomorrow. It is 18,000 for Grade 5 pupils."

"Hello Dad, the WiFi isn't working. I have an online lesson for Research Writing this evening. Send 6,500 to pay for its reconnection."

"Hello parents, the Grade 10 Yellow will be going for a Mathematics trip to the Museum of Illusion, Nairobi. The cost of the trip per student is 15,000."

"Boss, the tree on the lower side fell on the cowshed. Fundi repaired it. Send 4,000."

"Hello, dear, my dad's monthly diabetes clinic is tomorrow. Send me 7,000 to fuel the car."

"Baba Ray, good afternoon. Ray took three bunches of bananas for cooking yesterday. The Bill is 1500."

"Bro, the vet treated mum's cow. I paid 100, the balance is 2,900."

"Boss, the balance on the previous repair of the sockets and bulbs was 6,000. Please send me so that I can pay the electrical shop."

"Bro, my husband was severely injured last night after a fight. We are fundraising for his head surgery. As my elder bro, send 3,000."

"Hello, sir, James, the janitor in the maintenance department, lost his wife. We are fundraising. Send 1,000."

"Boss, I will not be there on Wednesday, so bring your car for service tomorrow morning. The bill is 8,000."

"Hello, cousin, I was called for an interview but I don't have fare. Please send me 1,000 for fare and lunch."

"Praise God, brethren, Kevin's wedding committee will sit tomorrow. As the chairman, you will kickstart the fundraising with 25,000."

"Good evening, your gym subscription will end tomorrow. Please pay 2,500 to continue with your fitness classes without interruption. Thank you."

"Hi, I need a favour. My gas went off when I had just put the veggies on cooker. Please send me 3,000. I will refund you tomorrow."

To be a MAN is to bear responsibility for all things.
#MasculinitySaturday

[Mange Kimambi 🇹🇿🇺🇸 @mangekimambi]

OMG!! 😭😭😭😭 hii ni Mortuary ya Mwananyamala. Alieachia video hii anahofia mnooo maisha yake ndo maana imemchukua muda sana kunipa video hii.

Anasema kuwa polisi walikuwa wanachukua simu za manesi na madokta wanafuta video na picha na kuwatishia wasirekodi kitu, yeye alikuwa na simu 2 so akawapa simu ambayo alikuwa hajarekodi chochote wakaridhika.

[MOSAFE @MOSAFE_]

Our team truly exceeded expectations on this one

Email: [email protected] or [email protected]

[Ndong@Conslaw @Ndonglaw043]

The saddest bit of this is the part where the Security forces try to signal Maurice Ogeta of the fact that he should now step aside as they carry away the casket and he walks a short distance then looks behind to see if Raila is around and okay. Then steps aside but still walks side by side as the casket moves. Loyalty to death. Ingrained in the veins.

[MethoDman @polo_kimanii]

Perhaps we’re missing the most important lesson we should be learning on Railas demise. That death is not a punishment. Death is a Stage. Its a reminder that no matter how much you compile while here,it doesn’t mean anything at the end. You leave it here and leave with nothing. Its like that game we used to play,bano,unajaza bano chupa mzima and then your mother tells you sitaki kuona izo vitu kwa nyumba yangu.

The best you can do while still here,is just be a good human being. If you’re in position to impact other people’s lives positively,please do so. If you can make life any less harder for someone,thats enough purpose to fulfill your purpose here. What you stole,what power you weild,what connections you had. That is meaningless,in the end.

Rest in pieces,Jakom!

[Ja Loka @_fels1]

90% of men receive their first flowers at their funerals.

[Julians Amboko @AmbokoJH]

The Auditor General's Special Report on Government Digital Payments Platform (eCitizen) is out!

Some heavy revelations here including the unearthing of diversion of funds from the mandatory 222222 Paybill for payment of government services to private accounts & the irregular collection of Convenience Fees totalling Kes 1.807 billion

A 🧵

[Doctor Of The Future™ @g_diets_]

🔥 Hidden Names for Sugar (a.k.a. “Sweet Poison in Disguise”) 🔥

Sugar doesn’t always wear its real name. Sometimes it shows up in the party wearing foundation, lip gloss and Yoruba demon energy — looking like health, but plotting diabetes in your bloodstream.

Here’s the list of sugar’s fake IDs:

🍬 Brown sugar
🍬 Caramel
🍬 Cane sugar
🍬 Coconut sugar (yes, even the “healthy” one)
🍬 Agave (the sneaky vegan favorite)
🍬 Corn syrup (used in almost everything processed)
🍬 Honey (still sugar. Still raises insulin)
🍬 Maple syrup (organic doesn’t mean innocent)
🍬 Rice syrup
🍬 Fruit juice concentrate
🍬 Dextrose
🍬 Fructose
🍬 Maltose
🍬 Glucose
🍬 Sucrose
🍬 High-fructose corn syrup
🍬 Barley malt
🍬 Evaporated cane juice
🍬 Turbinado
🍬 Molasses
🍬 Beet sugar
🍬 Date sugar
🍬 Nectar (sounds romantic, but it’s still sugar)

📍Message is simple:
Just because it’s “natural” doesn’t mean it’s harmless.
Just because it doesn’t say “sugar” doesn’t mean it’s not flooding your blood.

Sugar is sugar.
Your insulin doesn’t care if it came from a bee, a coconut, or Jesus’ hometown.

Avoid sugar. You don’t need it.
Not for energy. Not for vibes.
You have mitochondria. Use fat.

Your body wasn’t designed to run on desserts.
It was designed to survive.

🧠 Eat like you have a future.
📢 Share and tag someone who still thinks honey is health.

📍Don’t forget to reach out for a diet plan. We clean blood over here.

[Taichi for Health @StaminaFitnes]

Say goodbye to yellow teeth and tarta. 😬

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

Understanding How Different Types of Bank Loans Work in Kenya:

Save the thread below.

[The Ombudsman @Dan_Magabe]

@_fels1 How Much Land does a Man need? Pahom walked the whole day to acquire a large fertile land only to die of exhaustion!

[Eric @amerix]

Once you lose your influence e.g. status, fame or a job,

Your phone will go silent.

The many calls you were used to receiving, until you muted your ringtones, suddenly die.

The calls you were ignoring are not there anymore.

The message inbox becomes dry.

You change your ringtone from "silent" to "sound with vibration" so that you don't miss any ringing,

- But nobody is calling,

That is when it hits you that the people who were surrounding you with choruses of praises, were just people.

They already shifted their allegiance to the next influential person.

They were there because of what they were gaining from your influence, not you.

You become forgotten as fast as you rose to the position you just lost.

Therefore,

If you are still in a position of influence,

Remain modest.

Use your influence to support someone's life.

Become the candle in someone's dark moments.

Refuse to be proud and arrogant.

Ignore your haters. Don't respond to insults.

Most importantly, don't vomit on the shoes of those beneath you.

You will one day borrow their shoes to cross the bridge of your rock-bottom.

[Daily Nation @NationAfrica]

Oguda: Rest in peace, Dr Daniel Chacha – we failed you
https://t.co/2uEzrdFhbc

[The Ombudsman @Dan_Magabe]

@DStv, why are you not reconnecting me even after making payment! 7042689577

[Fact @Fact]

You can't make the same mistake twice. The second time you make it, it's no longer a mistake, it's a choice.

[President Biden Archived @POTUS46Archive]

Scripture says: “I have been young and now I’m old yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken.”

After all these years serving you, the American people, I have not seen the righteous forsaken.

I love you all.

May you keep the faith.
And may God bless you all.

[The Ombudsman @Dan_Magabe]

@XHNews Really?

[The Government Critic 🇰🇪 @magwaz3]

Waah! So this is why they are haunting Jimi Wanjigi?

[The Ombudsman @Dan_Magabe]

@jb_omukangala Unfortunately, in the play, Arum is used by the regime to spread propaganda about Moonlight Bill then killed by government machinery