brows furrow as he mentioned dean and her dad being on the road. it was odd he didn’t join them.
“and you didn’t want to go with them?” she inquires as their son makes his way to them.
she leans down to lift him in her arms and sway him subconsciously.
— inside. then she looks away with tear filled eyes.
“you’re soulless.” she says looking back at him with a disgusted look, but it’s not aimed at him, or because of him. it’s because she’s never seen him so cold towards her. whoever, whatever did this will pay.
she makes note that he can’t even look at her, when there was a time he couldn’t stop looking at her, she has known him since they were children, and this isn’t sam, her sam. she feels a twinge in her chest as he speaks with no emotion. she pulls away from him far enough to —
Her question rings in his ears for a brief moment, his chin placed in her hand before he pulls his head away. He looks down the road, trying to find anywhere to avert his eyes to.
He has to leave. He shouldn't have called her, and now, he's cursing himself internally »
— see his face looking away from her and then the realization sets in.
“you’re different sam.” she says as she crosses all possibilities in her mind, silently staring at him as she bridges every single thought racing her mind. and then it really sets in that he is empty —
— as she sits there next to him. she knows if she stands from where she’s sitting he’s going to take off and she may never see him again. the only thing keeping him here is her weight on him. “don’t leave me again. whatever this is we can fix it. we’ve been through worse.”
she looks at the small child clinging to her leg and then back to sam and nods. “we have a son.” she says softly. their son looks up at him and for a moment it’s as if younger sam is looking back up at him. he looks just like his father everyday that passes.
amora grabs at —
Her hands are on him, grabbing at his shirt and face, but he doesn't know how he's meant to respond. Sam stares, brows furrowing lightly as he processes the clear emotions rolling off her. He swears, for a moment––– he almost feels guilty for being unable to return the same »
— sams chin gently and gazes into his eyes. she’s not entirely sure what emotion is radiating off him but she can feel the emptiness inside him. he’s not himself and she can feel it in her very soul. “what did they do to you while you were gone..?” she says feeling hopeless —
— his shoulder. eyes close as she cries, and their son still clings to her leg. “i can’t bear the weight of this life without you by my side.” she finally speaks after a moment of silence. “i just can’t do this without you, i can’t lose you again.”
she sets their son down and he immediately clings to her leg. she is grabbing sams face in her hands grasping him. she can tell she’s on the brink of losing him. it’s in the air that swells around them. if she lets him drive away now she will never see him again. that pang in —
Her voice echoes through his mind, making his chest tighten as his heart clenches in a mysteriously foreign way. He understands she’s upset, but he doesn’t understand the emotions coming through the phone. He can’t bring himself to get out of the car, though consciously, »
— she can only hope her words resonate with him. she’s moving her hands to grab at his shirt. “god damn it sammy please!” she is clenching his shirt in her hands as she cries, pleading for him to stay. “please don’t leave me again..” she finally sobs as she lays her head on —
she chuckles and leans her head against sams bicep and sighs contentedly.
“life is so good right now.” she says softly.
“no!” silas whines as he is told it’s bedtime soon.