purrpect™

$tonks, fantasy bball, cat enthusiast, 420, PCgamer, OG millenial

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@zerohedge There's a reason gambling is banned in Korea. Unless you're a foreigner 😂

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

Call to impeach Donald Trump - Sign the Petition! https://t.co/Uzfkp74qYs via @Change

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@bennyjohnson Anything to stall the release of those Epstein files

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@elonmusk Stfu Elon

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@unusual_whales All the more reason not to shop.

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@beamin_redshirt @edge_of_power Yes bc absolutely no one should be our is investing in ai or it's infrastructure? This comment itself is dumb and goes against the spirit of investing.

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@TheLongInvest Rate cuts incoming this week

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

$GME Ready for takeoff 🛫

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@GavinNewsom Eyes of a traitor

[Warren Gunnels @GunnelsWarren]

Elon Musk Wealth
2012: $2 billion
2025: $486 billion

Larry Ellison Wealth
2009: $23 billion
2025: $370 billion

Mark Zuckerberg Wealth
2008: $1.5 billion
2025: $245 billion

Jeff Bezos Wealth
1998: $1.6 billion
2025: $233 billion

Minimum Wage
2009: $7.25
2025: $7.25

Obscene

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

"It is time." Melania's last words to Putin in her letter. Always found it odd.

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@chickengenius I took you advice 🐔 sitting on just starter positions

[BonkDaCarnivore @BonkDaCarnivore]

@WhiteHouse

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

We fight. https://t.co/wssin2KeBb

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

Israel bombing Iran was basically the Knicks firing their head coach with no plan

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@chickengenius Jason is the weakest of them all.

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

@PeterSchiff it will also devalue the dollar even further and make everything more unaffordable to working class families.

[purrpect™ @DanielitoLee]

Israel really is trying to become the world's most hated but the world governments are also complicit. Power to the people.