Daniel Nichols

my Twitter is devoted entirely to things that sound funny out of context.

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

Me: “could you imagine a 300lb 6’5” football player tackling you as hard as he can?

Lindsey: “no! I would simply pass away.”

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

Lindsey: “It’s hard to see a grandparent decline… my grandma had a stroke”

Isaac: “I’m sorry”

Lindsey: “She’s better now!”

Isaac: “Oh she got better?”

Lindsey: “oh no she died…”

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

@bensmithlive FASTING

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“That’s what we do in Texas, we elongate our vowels and shorten our words.” - another coworker

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“The smell of cigarette smoke, exhaust, and cold air all together takes me back to Christmas with my parents.” - a coworker

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“As I get older I start to smell like onions.” - Kari

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

@etsyjamie SEND

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

@stackingcad Follow

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“Satan is in the water pipes I swear.” - Brady

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

@EcomShri Google

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

@ArthurWebDesign LIST

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“We’ve gotta just wipe out the government and start from scratch. Start with resurrecting George Washington… or Jesus.” - Isaac

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

*discussing AI*

My boss: “I need something in my brain that remembers things that I forget.”

My coworker: “you mean like a brain?”

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“Is being Jewish a race or a religion? Think about it.” - Isaac Duckworth

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“Meth is like, bad for you.” - Isaac learning from the ER

[Daily Wire @realDailyWire]

It’s the movie they really don’t want you to see: #WhatIsAWoman?

Watch the explosive documentary starring @MattWalshBlog FREE on Twitter for 24 hrs. https://t.co/qDi7thCNid

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“At some point you just need to let another man look at you.” - Isaac

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“I’m very effective at using denial.” - Juan

[Daniel Nichols @danielnichols92]

“The other David is Nathan.” - Cindy