Dan Read

it's the little things that make life fun

[Dan Read @danielwead]

I think I am back

[Dan Read @danielwead]

“Relief is the greatest pleasure.”
^affirm or deny

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Katie thinks my superpower is falling asleep quick. My superpower is actually waking up super early.

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Spilled popcorn in the basement is like my children’s way of saying “I want a pet mouse” #dadlife

[Dan Read @danielwead]

The mark of a good country song is to make it sound like it is making fun of a country song.

[Dan Read @danielwead]

The binary programmer in me always gets so turned on looking at a clock this time of day

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Micaiah: “Are they married yet?”
McKenna: “Not yet, but they are fully engaged.”

[Dan Read @danielwead]

When counting two minutes you will find it easier to count to 60 twice, rather than 2 sixty times. #lifeobservation

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Remember when we ended up borrowing all that money from our kids but then couldn’t pay them back? #stimuluschecks

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Are we practicing safety or compliance? #WearYourMask

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Just over here sobbing after watching #ItsAWonderfulLife for the first time in twenty years. It means so much more as an adult and especially as a small business owner

[Dan Read @danielwead]

But what if the last one is a chewy one? #whopperroulette

[Dan Read @danielwead]

This far-right truck appears to be making some liberal headway

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Some days you just wake up #blessed with a no-wipe poop

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Definitely read that as Life’s Over

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Sometimes my wife buys fancy hand soaps that smell so realistic you want to taste them. Sometimes my 3 year old does just that.

[Dan Read @danielwead]

Late to bed but early to rise makes a man fatigued yet wealthy and wise

[Dan Read @danielwead]

March 23rd, 2020. The day that 60% of the American workforce discovered they were "non-essential". #COVID19OhioReady

[Dan Read @danielwead]

"I had to poop so bad that I peed out of my buns"
-Boaz, age 3
#kidsexplain #thatsdiarrheason