Dan LaMorte

On stage, on the spectrum. A stand-up comedian and ultra-runner based in NYC. Upcoming tour dates can be found below ⬇️

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

There’s the finish folks. Finished my first ultramarathon (40 miles on trails) in 9 hours flat. I am so thankful for all of you who have taken an interest in my story, my weight loss and my running life. This finish was for all of us.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

The guy in front of me on this flight reclined his seat so far back that he tried turning off my air vent because it was, “making his head chilly.”

[Hollywood Improv @HollywoodImprov]

How to run an ultramarathon. @DanLaMorte

See Dan headline The Lab tonight at 7:30pm! Get your tickets now at https://t.co/2zDeuaxUJc

#hollywoodimprov #comedy

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

I had one of those weddings where numerous people came up to us and said, “We could genuinely feel the love in the air.” A year and half later, we got divorced. It must’ve been asbestos.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

Just smoked a joint for the first time in 4 months, within 10 minutes, I convinced myself a car was following me home. I move forward, it slowly moved forward. A second car does the same. Then I realize, I’m standing next to a fast-food drive thru. God I’ve missed this excitement

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

I’ve been seeing a lot of pregnant runners lately, which is bad ass, but it makes you wonder if that’s good for the baby. The number one thing I know about babies is you’re not supposed to shake them, maybe running is more of a stir than a shake.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

Getting divorced is the most adult thing I’ve done in my life so far. I don’t have a mortgage, but I do have an ex-wife, and that seems like the same thing to me.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

Everyone is talking about how super shoes make you faster in the marathon, but watch how quickly you finish when you wear them in the bedroom. Sub-2 minutes.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

Eating 50 grams of carbs every 25 minutes in the bedroom to let her know she’s fucking an athlete

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@harbs16 It is in fact me last week at the Hyner View 50k, no skin surgery either. I was 23 at my heaviest, still young enough to bounce back well, also, I work harder than most people athletically so things tightened. Lower stomach and upper legs still have extra skin though.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

Thanks to everyone who liked my post yesterday. There were lots of questions. Main one, what do you weigh now? I went from 354 to low 160’s; currently carb loaded from weeks of racing, so slightly heavier, but no ozempic, no surgery, just running & lifting.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@KingBohan No surgery. For core, there is videos of the Kenyan marathon runners ab workout online, it’s my go to. I also do a lot of side planks, planks, and copenhagens to tighten mid section as well as an ab wheel. I am also very big into pushups to tighten upper body skin!

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@R2Fee2 I did get into tattoos after, always liked them but never got them when I was heavier.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@brett1wb In the early stages, it was a lot of hiking / long walks, which led to running. And that was just a few miles until I was able to grow. I also lifted in the beginning too, as I found that easier on my joints than running at a heavier weight. Even just an hour a day is good

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@JoyLondonCol I never cared about going fast but now that I can, I don’t want to do anything else! It’s too fun

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@DanSorek If I’m in the gym, those 3 days legs are being worked. Deadlifts, calf raises, squats (split, box, etc.) maybe even some bike work. Most of my upper body work is pushups (hundreds a day), sometimes I’ll mess with lifting but for speed, it’s better to carry less muscle IMO.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@DanSorek Main training goal is Leadville 100 in August, so this has been a fun side quest (speed). At this point of my block I was at 70-80 mile weeks with 3 days of strength training, minimum. That will raise to 100+ miles, and depending on how body feels, try to maintain 3 days lifting.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@brett1wb In the early stages, doctors told me gluten was bloating me, so I cut that out. Stopped fast food. But, truthfully, I didn’t dial in my diet until this year some 8-years later. I ebbed & flowed a lot, got down to 180, raised to 220. Activity was high, always. But diet shows abs

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@aussieflya not at all, my cousin took that on a drone because it was a wide enough angle versus a phone lol. I didn’t even take a pic of the scale when I hit the 350’s because I didn’t think I had what it took to lose it.

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

@lonehiking My first ultra was 5 years ago, I probably started running two years before that. Maybe less. I never had speed until this year when I really dialed in the training and got a coach. I took off more weight, intro’d strength training, and some stride work. Training has been intense

[Dan LaMorte @DanLaMorte]

354 pounds, to a 1:25 half marathon finish. I’ve been an ultra runner for a few years, but decided to mess around with speed a bit lately. Training hard, processing a divorce, but at no point have taken the foot off the gas. Last 2.5 miles were in the 5:00’s. Life rewards work.