Daphne Aguilera

DAPHNES ON THE SET!!! My names daphne aguilera im a superstar , im a singer songwriter DANCER!

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

I wanna fuck the trivago guy @trivago make it happen

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

@KimKardashian private club: DSL

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

Just got a waxing done, My @amyschumer is so red it looks like that red faced nazi from captain America

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

I like to call my vagina @amyschumer

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

Just got released from a Beijing prison , well not so much released, more like I punched a guard in the balls with my teeth and hauled ass

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

Why the fuck do you little bitches like pumpkin spice?
What's next, pussy juice?

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

Roses are red violets are blue, mess with me and you'll eat my shoe. #lunch

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

@ass_dat @andydick FUCK YOU,
that's when.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

Some little shit just called me iggy azalea, so I hit that 5 year old with the heel of my boot and said "TASTE MY IGGY BITCH!"And hauled ass

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

I tried lighting my fart on fire, nearly burned all my ass hairs off.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

Tbt when I met that guy from Mrs Doubtfire

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

I'm getting corrective surgery... To fix my inverted nipples.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

My ass bone is broke.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

When life gives you lemons, take those lemons and squeeze them in some bitches eyes.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

If she got hit by a bus

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

People say I look like @andydick and @kathygriffin but I really look like @cher

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

I'm so rich I got a coat made out of ewok fur.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

My morning breath smells like vodka cigarettes and a 19 year old Puerto Rican waiter ... I met last night.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

There's a fight club under every toys r us in California. Just tell them Mama sent you.

[Daphne Aguilera @DaphneAguilera]

Just woke up from a coma, from drinking to much clamato juice.. And um who the F#@k is @MileyCyrus and why is she copying me?!