el ☆ shedtwt

tw suicidal/chronic depression/sh ☆ cw: too much, ugw: 40 or less ☆ pro recovery but im NOT in recovery ☆ too old to still be dealing with this, yet here i am

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

☆short intro☆

you can call me el
im on shtwt but struggle with many more mental health issues like anxiety, panic attacks, chronic depression and suicidality, and i got diagnosed with asd a few years ago
i love music, animals and soccer
no dni, just be kind^^

[LaDani @ladaniiiiiiiii]

Estoy más cerca de mi suicidio que a casarme algún día

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

i always try to be as quiet as possible bc i know people usually sleep when im awake but why the fuck are all my neighbors so loud then at 6am🥲

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

@P3rson17 oh dont be sorry, i totally get the confusion there. i could have phrased it differently or added more information😅 im sorry i worried you

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

im absolutely gonna regret this but i planned an email to be send to my doctors from the euthanasia clinic with the hopes they'll still give me a chance.. i need to take the risk but they're probably not gonna help me anyway

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

haven't played my comfort game in over a month.. probably says a lot about how bad im doing mentally

[Feelings ღ @anxietymsgs]

we all broke our rules for someone.

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

on shedtwt for 2 years already (with this account).. but none of the og communities are there anymore and it just hasn't been the same lately:(

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

100+ likes, where did that come from?! follow me for more depressing shit lol

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

im not made for life

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

please stop reporting me for self harm and suicidal thoughts and shit. im an adult so no worries. dont get me banned bro 💀

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

@xcoolxjulie03 yeah thats how i feel about myself and my life. i do still have hope for others tho.. so for you too. stay strong 🫶🏻

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

@xcoolxjulie03 I'm sorry you can relate.. I hope it will change for the better for you 🫂

[Feelings ღ @anxietymsgs]

i don’t blame anyone for leaving me i mean look at me i wanna leave me too.

[⋆｡𖦹 ° @rjmxrell]

i’m so sensitive and i hate that

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

im so bored but have no energy or mental capacity to do anything so im just constantly frustrated with myself while being exhausted from not even doing anything

[el ☆ shedtwt @darkestmind96]

i want everyone to leave me alone bc im only a miserable burden, but at the same time im so lonely.. i hate how my brain works. i hate myself so fucking much.