Smirky Aslan

I'm just a normal guy who puts one incredibly toned leg in his designer Wal-Mart pants at a time and then fights the machine for human supremacy.

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

I got more beer because I have alabaster skin and he can't handle it.

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

@bhuichapa you're billy mays?!

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

I ain't no goddamn necromonger, or rectummonger for that. @bhuichapa @KyrilBrewer

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

If you pick the white power ranger, you're not going to be part of the solution, you're goin to be part of the problem.

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

The black panther did not advocate non-peaceful action for this. #endsegregation

[Kyril Brewer @KyrilBrewer]

Get off this motha fucken jones

[Kyril Brewer @KyrilBrewer]

@dasridge @bhuichapa I love a good tocalama bitch

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

Dude. I'll eat a can of this shit. @KyrilBrewer @bhuichapa

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

If Abraham Lincoln could see us now... #endsegregation

[Denny’s @DennysDiner]

to the people asking who runs this account: i am an egg. i don't understand your human problems.

and sadly,

i never will.

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

This isn't why Rosa Parks turned up. #endsegregation

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

Martin Luther King Jr. didn't fight for this. #endsegregation

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

@AMCTalkingDead I think from this episode we learned we should adopt the #buddysystem in the apocalypse. #DeadBuzz

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

Ring ring. What's that? It's classified. #DeadBuzz

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

Ring ring. What's that? It's a missed call. It was me. Calling it. #DeadBuzz

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

I ordered a Supreme Court, where's all the other toppings? #shouldwritefor #zoolander

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

I'd be better off as a car because people would actually ride me. #randomtag #Undrafted #kindafits

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

Someone had to do it; why not lemurs? #randomtag #alltheboss

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

Five out of five would shit eventually. #randomtag #ReturnOfTheKing

[Smirky Aslan @dasridge]

@bhuichapa