Dave Mac 🎃☃️🐰

Haligonian. I like orange flavoured beverages. He/him

[lewis @Lewiswbt1]

Oh great, you've thought of a sentence that uses every letter of the alphabet. Too bad it perpetuates harmful stereotypes about dogs and foxes. I hope it was worth it

[playful peter @w0rldmap]

Just heard a strange podcast where the host was singing and playing guitar the whole time? and it was only 3 minutes long

[Neo @NeoWokio]

me trying to find the HDMI port on my TV

[Kip Conlon @kipconlon]

My dream of being a poet vanished like a thing in a whatever.

[Shaun Johnson @ShyBucketGetter]

Did you know in HEAT (1995) the iconic shoutout scene was entirely improvised?

After finishing their scene, Val Kilmer and Robert DeNiro decided to kill all the cops that had shutdown traffic, unaware director Micheal Mann was still filming.

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

ME: Can I buy you a drink?

HER: I have a boyfriend.

ME: {counting coins on the table} He can only get something small then.

[John Kennedy @FrazzleMyGimp]

So crazy that Julius Caesar had that line queued up when Brutus stabbed him. If my friend stabbed me id say something like “Ow Ben” or “Whats gotten into you Ben”

[Colin the Dachshund @DachshundColin]

Imagine if WWIII starts with the IDF assassinating Franz Ferdinand.

[prettier jesus @bxsel]

Ugh I wish there was a movie about a woman selling the fuck out of her mop

[Dweller @One_Way_Home]

When boredom strikes, be creative…

[staxxx🦅 @papiwontmiss]

I’m waiting to board my flight at the airport and I just saw a woman finish her book, stand up and angrily throw it in the bin.

[Michael McKean @MJMcKean]

Catherine’s knowledge of humanity was always at the center of her comedy, no matter how absurd the character or loopy the material. She could play heartless because she was warm, brainless because she was brilliant, careless because she truly cared. Everyone loved her and everyone learned from her. This is a deep loss.

[Sopranos Central @orange_peelbeef]

In 2012, an Icelandic television station (Channel 2) accidentally broadcast an episode of Teletubbies with Icelandic subtitles intended for The Sopranos.

[Andrew—#IAmTheResistance @AmoneyResists]

LMFAO when you lay it out like this the absurdity is just STAGGERING.

[Brian Stelter @brianstelter]

A statement from the family of Alex Pretti, obtained by CNN:

"We are heartbroken but also very angry.

Alex was a kindhearted soul who cared deeply for his family and friends and also the American veterans whom he cared for as an ICU nurse at the Minneapolis VA hospital. Alex wanted to make a difference in this world. Unfortunately he will not be with us to see his impact. I do not throw around the hero term lightly. However his last thought and act was to protect a woman.

The sickening lies told about our son by the administration are reprehensible and disgusting. Alex is clearly not holding a gun when attacked by Trump’s murdering and cowardly ICE thugs. He has his phone in his right hand and his empty left hand is raised above his head while trying to protect the woman ICE just pushed down all while being pepper sprayed.

Please get the truth out about our son. He was a good man. Thank you."

[Kip Conlon @kipconlon]

Me: What does a leprechaun wear on his honeymoon?

Friend: [grins] What?

Me: No, I’m asking you.

[broti gupta @BrotiGupta]

I’m worried that if I met the muppets they would be much smaller than i imagine them to be. Like when youre taller than your mom or something. Im worried about other stuff too

[Brendan O'Hare @brendohare]

ME: I will have 4 blueberry muffins for dinner please
DUNKIN DONUTS CASHIER: Please do not tell us that you're having them for dinner

[Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred]

Commenting “AI slop” under pictures of my friends’ kids opening presents