David Cohen

Like most losers, I enjoy self-deprecating humor.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

I feel like none of you talk enough about the fact that we’re meat sacks cursed with consciousness and then just inevitably one day randomly that consciousness will end.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

“I’m crying because the sun was in my eyes. Not from the majesty of the hawk.” Me pointing out the red tail flying around our house to my girlfriend.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

More like John Greatman.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@bearnurse Shouldn’t he be whipping Jumbo out?

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@bearnurse @zcregger In my house we have a code word. “Popcorn”. When you notice something is a one shot you can just say “popcorn” to make sure everyone else notices what is happening. Oner’s are like my favorite thing in cinema ever. Also, yes, weapons whipped ass.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@padfootva @glazedfl @RealSportsBoys @cheem_szn @Leisure_Hour_ Very excited to see you in Jax. Right before seeing you again at fest.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@bearnurse Whenever my partner hears me listening to the mountain goats she says “why are you sad?”. I told her “I’m not always sad when I listen to the mountain goats but I always listen to the mountain goats when I’m sad.”

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@bearnurse My girlfriend rolls her eyes when every time we leave the house I say “let’s rock and roll McDonald’s”. She can suck a cheetahs dick.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@extensioncorb I’m tickets.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

Going to a bar and having a stranger threaten to crack my skull open for playing music on the jukebox is a cool thing to happen.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

Oh hell yeah. I need this yesterday. Ready to ride my bike to work again.

[News4JAX @wjxt4]

The North Florida Transportation Planning Organization announced on Monday it collaborated with the City of Jacksonville to plan a continuous shared-use path called the “Core-2-Coast Trail.”
https://t.co/0LDlPm7Oex

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@bearnurse Sure. If it means we can hang out. Sorry. I’m drunk.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@bearnurse Me too. Same birthday club. Us and Raven Simone.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@ericheartsu Such a sad time together.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

I like sad songs that mention blood and bones and muscle and guts and alcohol and nicotine.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

I swear. This happens every time. I WISH the Democratic nominee was as liberal as the conservatives say they are. Every right wing talking point about how “Kamala bad” is something that if true, would make me like her and be excited about voting for her.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@extensioncorb Sure. Rather is doing a lot of the heavy lifting there. I’d RATHER a lot of things. But this is the world we are in. So suck it up. Yes. God. It’s all awful. But it can get so much worse. So just do the less bad thing.

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@r0bbbbbbbbbb Who does their printing? And why isn’t it me?

[David Cohen @daveysaurusrex]

@gunsnrosesgirl3 Ink. Not paint.