Adrian Davidson

Comedy Writer, Humor Copywriter, Speechwriter, Former Stand-Up Comedian

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Any congressperson responsible for airport delays should be forced to stand in line for 3+ hours to get into the US Capitol Building. They should also be vigorously frisked.

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Just read an article where frozen excrement dropped from a plane and crashed through the roof of a woman’s house in Canada. She didn’t see that shit coming.

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

“Pursue your dreams… for as long as it takes for you to fail, then give up and become an accountant.” - Every young person’s parents in 2026

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

FDA considering “Fentanap,” Fentanyl-Infused Sleeping Gummies For Kids With ADHD

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

If you watch a politician super closely on television, you can see their soul leaving their body.

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

@ogafroman for President, you heard it here first.

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Man in Florida dies after eating gas station sushi. His last words: "I shoulda seen this coming."

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Have you ever reached into a popcorn bowl at a bar at the same time as another man, touched hands, then thought, how come my dad never told me he loved me? Yeah, me neither.

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

On the downside, national unemployment rose to 4.4%. On the upside, insider trading is up 100%.

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

"I see that you live your life with integrity, honesty, principle, and kindness. AND you've been faithfully married for 15 years?!" I'm afraid you won't fit in here."
- Congress

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Breaking news: I've been tapped to be the presidential envoy for "WTF is going on with this country?"

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

When Your Boss Takes Credit For Your Work https://t.co/E771OlckuX via @YouTube

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Alexa, she's always listening...
https://t.co/53OUpKw42p

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Let's bring back hibernation leave. https://t.co/YA226ln3qD via @YouTube

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Goldilocks and The Illegal Alien Bears https://t.co/8jlJ1nIVaF via @YouTube

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

How I feel at work sometimes https://t.co/TTByZH9CNb via @YouTube

[billy eichner @billyeichner]

I miss NYC. ❤️

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Don Rickles: In anything you do if you just go the ordinary line and just have the general approach you'll be the average guy. But if you believe in what you do, you cause excitement, you're gonna get people that say I love him or I can't stand him, so be it.

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

The first bullet at the top of my new resumé reads: "I've never rage-screamed 'I feel threatened' at Costco."

[Adrian Davidson @DavidsonSatire]

Queen Elizabeth: And remember son, all I ask of you, is whatever you do never, ever do anything to embarrass this family.
Andrew: Yes mum, you have my word. Have you met my friend Jeffrey?