David Townsend

sometimes I try to be funny, clever, and inspirational. it usually doesn’t work.

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

the sound of someone administering hand sanitizer has always been distinctly recognizable. now it’s inescapable. coronavirASMR

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

i’m adept at convincing my Apple Watch i have stood, when in fact i have not #TransferableSkills

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

super thankful for the @andpizza at @Reagan_Airport because it means I can get my Moonstruck fix at 6am

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

there is great power in giving away great power

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

there is so much beauty in this world that’s missed because it’s covered in a little dirt, and all we choose to see is the dirt.

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

why are sprinkles not called sugar rice?

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

*turbulence*

Marshall: “it’s like we’re hitting potholes in the sky”

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

@rileywpagett Yess!!! My favorite DC spot!! Miss that place! Pictures of the Year exhibit is a must!

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

I sneezed my headphones out of my ears today.. I didn’t know you could do that

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

my favorite thing about flying is that you get to spend an incredible amount of time in uncomfortably close proximity with complete strangers

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

honestly just impressed with the confidence my orgo professor has to ask questions that create the most uncomfortable silences I have ever experienced in my life

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

my organic chemistry professor just got on a tangent straight up roasting people who are scared of ingredients they can’t pronounce on food labels

this is such a personal plot twist, but I think I have a new favorite professor

whowouldathunk

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

@thsirsarcasm24 😂😂😂

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

When celebrities get that bread:

Cardi Wheat
Lauren Bagel
Toast Malone
Bread Sheeran
Justin Timber-bake

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

@MeghanYerkes YES!

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

@mitchzun So good!

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

*fixing my resume*

*Professional Certifications*

“Making irrelevant references only I understand”

hire me please thanks

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

the construction dude on campus was watching fixer upper in the lounge today so I guess this is a research campus now

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

@Bryce_Cluff 😂😂

[David Townsend @davidtownsend_]

@Bryce_Cluff He’s not here