Scott Davis

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

As a kid we were told to remember HOMES to memorize the Great Lakes:

H - Huron
O - Ontario
M - Michigan
E - Erie
S - Superior

If Trump changes Lake Ontario to Lake America, I propose the new acronym should be SHAME.

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

Josie and the Pussycats implies that Josie herself is in fact not a cat, unlike the other two band members.

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

So apparently in addition to driving on the wrong side of the road the British call the permission to do so a “driving licence” and not a “driver’s license”.

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

City themed bar/nightclub names:
- San Fran Disco
- Dallas Buyers Night Club
- Drinks on Miami

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

apparently I also pluralize it like a true Michigander. I wonder if you can still get this disappointment of a gum at Meijers or Walmarts. 💭

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

Yipes. Stripes. Fruit stripes gum. The definition of “sweet but short”

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

Also, I’ve been saying Yikes this whole time.

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

I was listening to a yacht rock playlist on Spotify and Night Moves by Bob Seger came on. I was confused at first, but GoogleAI reassured me that I was not crazy.

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

It’s strange living on planet planet earth because oxygen is both essential for life while at the same time it’s slowly killing you. I’ve got my suspicions about gravity as well.

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

Prime Numbers. That’s the Tweet. https://t.co/yjkjd6KVK4

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

How tf fast-food places be charging $9.50 for a burger that don’t even got a tomato on it?

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

I present to you the Deutsche Bahn paradox inspired by Heidelberg’s Uncertainty Principle.

The train is both delayed and on time depending on the observer. When you rely on a connecting train it will be late. If you are trying to catch a connection it will always leave on time.

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

The plural of Lego should be Legos 🧱

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

Einstein’s last words may be lost to history, but we think we know his first ones: “Die Suppe ist zu heiß / The soup is too hot.”

He didn’t start speaking until age 3 or 4. When his parents asked him why, he allegedly responded “Because up until now everything has been fine.” 🍲

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

I just leveled up to level 50 playing German on Clozemaster! https://t.co/hQ6L7ka28K

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

Someone flew over the midwest and invented Microsoft Excel

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

What’s the point of wearing gloves while preparing food if you’re going to handle cash and use the POS system at the same time?

[Austin Burke @theBurk3nator]

Hands down the scene of the decade so far… Remarkable performances, impeccable editing, and even some very subtle product placement in there (if you can even catch it) #WarOfTheWorlds
https://t.co/5KT2zjFatV

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

The train station is a great place to run into people. And I mean quite literally run into people, like when they’re rushing for their train and almost smash into you.😛 🚂 🏃‍♂️

[Scott Davis @davissc5]

When dentists say open wider they mean open taller. But since they’re sitting sideways, I guess I get what they mean.