ada bbrp pertanyaan yg belakangan ini susah bgt kujawab:
"biasanya weekend ngapain aja?"
"kamu hobinya apa?"
"suka dengerin lagu apa? artis favoritnya siapa?"
i don't even know what i like; it seems that nothing ever excites me anymore 🥹
i want to rediscover my spark.
jenazah tidak menyeramkan ketika orangnya orang yang kita sayang. aku nggak akan pernah lupa sedingin apa kening papa waktu aku cium untuk terakhir kalinya. aku cuma cium kening, nggak yang lain. bengong aja. oh beneran ya? udah nggak hangat kayak kalo pelukan biasanya? nggak takut, cuma mixed feelings-nya udah hampir 2 tahun nggak hilang.
Girls in my community (Ozoro, Delta state) are currently getting molested and raped because of a sick tradition that says any woman who’s out from 12noon today is allowed to get molested. The videos I’ve seen are horrific.
It’s so weird how relationship’s bare minimum suka diarahin ke hal hal borjuis kaya fancy dinner, buket bunga uang segede kasur, transferan sampe iphone terbaru.
Takutnya, secara ga langsung jadi invalidasi perasaan bahagia orang orang yang hubungannya dirayakan dengan makan kaki lima, jalan jalan ke air terjun hidden gem, atau sekedar quality time di teras rumah.
Ngga bitter kok, tapi kayanya lebih bijak captionnya “this is my standard” instead of bare minimum, karena jadi generalisir semua pasangan.
Gak semua hati perempuan bisa dibeli dengan kemewahan.
Sebagian dari mereka hanya butuh satu hal: rasa aman dari sikap dan cara berpikir seorang laki-laki.
Karena pada akhirnya, yang dicari bukan sekadar siapa yang paling kaya atau paling tampan, tapi siapa yang paling pantas untuk dihargai dan dihormati.
dear laki2,
hati2 ya, kalau kita sudah merasa punya penghasilan yg cukup mapan, punya istri yg baik, punya anak yg lucu2,
jangan coba "main api", jangan cari yg aneh2, kalau mulai jenuh di hubungan coba bicarakan dengan istri, cari solusi bareng2 agar hubungan kembali "menyala" lagi. atau kita coba cari tantangan baru di kerjaan/bisnis agar tenaga dan fokus kita bisa jadi sesuatu yg lebih berfaedah.
ingat kembali kenangan2 bersama pasangan kita, di saat baru pertama kali ketemu, momen2 sweet yg pernah terlintas, sampai lewatin susah dan sulitnya hidup dari 0.
pada akhirnya kesenangan sementara itu akan membawa pada neraka kehidupan selamanya, bahkan bukan cuma di dunia, di akhirat juga. kesenangan sementara itu bisa hancurkan masa depan anak2 kita.
kalau sudah terjadi penyesalan sudah tidak ada artinya, mati-pun tidak bisa memperbaiki.
ini jg sebagai pengingat buat saya pribadi.
*efek abis nonton la tahzan di netflix 😅
Someone always asks it like a joke.
“Why don’t women get addicted to gambling?” said with that half smirk, like women are too sensible, too boring, too busy knitting and paying bills while men ruin their lives at poker tables.
The real answer is ugly and simple: who told you they do not.
You just see male addiction more because his fall is allowed to be public. He gets the smoky casino, the dramatic all in, the story at 3:00 about how he lost the house. A woman is more likely to be losing in silence on her phone in the kitchen while the pasta water boils over. Same nervous system, different socially acceptable scenery.
Picture her at 22:47, kids finally asleep, sink still full because there is always one more dish. She sits down “just for a second”, opens that bright slot app on her phone. It does not say casino. It says something like Lucky Farm or Star Paradise so it feels childish, harmless. She spins. Four dollars. Seven. Twelve. The dopamine hits the same way it would in Vegas. Her heart does the same little jump when almost all the cherries line up. No cigarette smoke, no neon, just fridge hum and the sound of the washer in the next room. Still gambling.
Or she is in a supermarket at 11:32 on a Wednesday, buying the boring list. Milk. Bread. Laundry detergent that never goes on sale. At the checkout she adds three scratch cards “for fun.” The cashier does not blink. A mom with a cart and scratchers is invisible. She will scratch them later in the car, key pressed between her teeth, crumbs of silver dust on her black jeans. For a moment her life is not coupons and appointments. It is possibility. Then it is nothing again. She crumples the slips, drives home, tells no one.
The addiction is not missing. It is disguised as something cute or practical or feminine.
“Girls trip to bingo.”
“Grandma loves the lottery.”
“Mom just likes her little games.”
Men are allowed to have vices. Women are supposed to have quirks.
People think gambling is only about chips and cards. Women are taught to gamble with different currency. A lot of them learn early how to bet their body, their safety, their whole future on a guy who “just needs support.” That is a slot machine too. You pull the handle every time you forgive. Maybe this time he will change. Maybe this time he will really mean it. Your heart spins like reels, and you keep feeding in years.
Why would she need blackjack when she has a relationship that pays out once every ten arguments.
Ask the girl who keeps refreshing her banking app at 03:12 because she moved money from the rent to an “investment” her boyfriend swore would work if she just trusted him. Ask the woman who married into someone else’s chaos and is now betting her credit score on his business. She might never have touched a poker table in her life. She is still addicted to risk, just socially approved risk. The kind that gets called loyalty.
NO, it is not that women do not get addicted. It is that their addictions are easier to applaud.
Be thin. But not too thin. Eat. But do not enjoy it. Spend on your looks. But never admit how much. That is gambling too. Every diet is a roulette of health. Every “just one more round of fillers” is a bet that your face will translate as youth instead of desperation. Nobody calls that addiction. They call it discipline, self care, staying competitive. Entire industries sit on top of that female urge to feel like they have one more chance to fix themselves.
If a guy spends three nights a week in a casino, his friends say he has a problem.
If a woman spends three nights a week alone with her phone, spinning digital slots while everyone thinks she is scrolling Pinterest, people say she is tired. Or “mom deserves her wine and her silly games.” The problem does not ring loud enough to be named.
okay… here goes;
my friend once told me that the strongest people are usually the ones who never got the love they deserved at the age they needed it most.
they grew up learning to be their own comfort. they became the ones who check on others because nobody checked on them.
they mastered resilience not because they wanted to be strong, but because every time they reached out,
no one reached back.
they laugh the loudest, because silence reminds them of every room they cried in alone. they give the best advice, because they had to heal themselves without directions.
they are soft, painfully soft even though life taught them hardness first.
and the saddest part?
you meet them today and think:
“wow, you’re so independent.” but you’ll never see the little kid inside who prayed for at least one person to choose them… and stay.
there are people you know right now who carry their entire world alone, and you will never notice until it crashes.
oh well, that’s none of your business.
but maybe it should be.🫶🏽
saw a quote that said, “anger is the part of you that loves you the most. it shows up when you're being mistreated, ignored or disrespected. it's a signal - calling you to step away from what's harming you.
whether it's a room, a job, a relationship or an old version of yourself, anger let's you know when it's time to walk away. if you learn to listen to it, to trust it and make it your ally, it won’t need to shout so loudly."
Meluruskan aja:
Revolusionernya QRIS bukan sistem pembayaran pakai scan QR. Kl itu jauh duluan Alipay & Wechatpay di 🇨🇳
Kerennya QRIS itu interoperability, 1 sistem bisa terima dari bank/wallet manapun. Kl kalian inget sblm QRIS, di toko ada bbrp QR code krn semua sendiri2
Jadi dulu punya temen kantor yg aliran semua hal jujur bilang ke istrinya.
Mau lagi 'entertain' client pun bilang.
Dan bener istrinya woles aja.
Karena yg bikin perempuan ga woles itu dikibul2in seolah mereka bodoh, ga layak dilibatkan, dan ga pantas dikasih tau.