Derek Bambauer

Irving Cypen Professor of Law, University of Florida Levin College of Law. AI and alligators, with sides of patents, Internet censorship, and cybersecurity.

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

My op-ed in AI Journal: When it comes to AI, we need to stop regulating tools and start regulating systems https://t.co/2RZF05hXtV

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

Thinh Nguyen and I have an op-ed in AI Journal discussing how the Supreme Court's Cox Communications v. Sony Music Entertainment decision protects AI innovation: The Supreme Court just saved AI — without even mentioning it https://t.co/JnASG6nnUX

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

https://t.co/JTrqBr0yGr

How weird, I thought Florida Republicans were against cancel culture. But no. It turns out government censorship is costly. Not just in $$, but because of the talented researchers we can't hire due to the political censorship this state enforces.

[Restoring Your Faith in Humanity @HumanityChad]

When night walk is at 9:00, it is 9:02 right now

[Chris Hampson @chrishampsonlaw]

Nice write-up of a great piece by Lyrissa Lidsky and Andrew Daves, two of the wonderful people roaming the halls at @UFLaw

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

@marcorandazza As ever, plenty of work in N. Florida. Happy to help.

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

@derektmuller Again: "the most valuable heuristic of movement in the USNWR law school rankings? It’s a symbol of law school management."

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

"the most valuable heuristic of movement in the USNWR law school rankings? It’s a symbol of law school management. The rankings are simply something to be managed. If a school is managing the rankings well or poorly, one can observe and attempt to assess why" Quote @derektmuller

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

@derektmuller From Above the Law: https://t.co/19e7oR0uCS

"As for the biggest drop in this segment of the rankings, we’ve got Arizona (-11). Ooof."

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

Except at the end of the day, someone marks a box - or pays a seat deposit. And the polls / rankings are excellent predictors of that outcome.
Believe what you want. But jobs are on the line, and not just ours.

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

f you're Kia, and your ranking from, say, Car and Driver, of your Telluride goes from "top of class" to mid-level, you would be deeply concerned. If not panicked.
You would be right.

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

It's the single most important thing that applicants consider, including financial aid.
It's fashionable to conclude that the rankings don't matter. In the same way that political candidates prefer to believe that polls don't matter.

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

(UFLaw is moving on up, with record bar passage in 2025 and near-record job numbers.)

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

This is exactly right. One would think university presidents / provosts would use this as a metric for law school leadership. Most don't. In fact, there are very recent examples of law schools doubling down on leadership failure in this regard.

[Dr Helen Ingram @drhingram]

Being strapped into a rocket and then discovering the system runs on Microsoft is the stuff of nightmares

[Jeff Blehar is *BOX OFFICE POISON* @EsotericCD]

Hard to conceive of how anyone could have done a worse job as attorney general than Pam Bondi - but the great thing about the Trump administration is, we'll inevitably find out.

[Aakash Gupta @aakashgupta]

NASA pays $100M for Microsoft 365 licensing across the agency. They standardized every system on Microsoft. They put Microsoft Surfaces on the Orion spacecraft as the crew's personal computing devices.

And the first technical crisis of humanity's return to the Moon was Reid Wiseman radioing Houston to say he has two Microsoft Outlooks and neither one works.

Mission Control's response? "With your go, we can remote in and take a look." The same exact workflow your company's IT helpdesk uses when you submit a ticket on a Monday morning. Except the user is traveling at 4,275 mph, 30,000 miles from Earth, and the Wi-Fi situation is considerably worse.

This spacecraft survived hydrogen leaks, helium leaks, a faulty heat shield, and a broken toilet. Outlook broke anyway. The toilet actually got fixed faster.

The real story here is that Microsoft has achieved something no other software company in history can claim: a support ticket from lunar transit. Their enterprise sales team should frame this. "Battle-tested in space" is a positioning statement most B2B companies would mass murder for, and Microsoft accidentally earned it because Outlook crashes everywhere, including orbit.

Outlook remains the only software in human history that performs identically whether you're in a cubicle in Redmond or aboard a spacecraft bound for the Moon. Universally, reliably broken. And we keep buying it anyway.

[Derek Bambauer @dbambauer]

Amen. One of the best short pieces I've read in a while. News Web sites are atrocious and, honestly, they make me indifferent to the plight of journalism when they're so openly contemptuous of their customers. https://t.co/qpkHrV9AoT