Derek

🤠👻🕶🦧🥀🍱🥋🧩🎞⛓🌐

[Derek @ddalton99]

If I had a time machine I’d go back and give all the Native Americans uzis. Just to see how we really feel about the second amendment

[Derek @ddalton99]

@JoshuaA86032329

[Derek @ddalton99]

@JoshuaA86032329 We should’ve gone to that G League tryout smh

[Derek @ddalton99]

@JoshuaA86032329 @garyvee

[Derek @ddalton99]

I didn’t even see one 40 year old dressed up as spiderman. What’s the point

[Derek @ddalton99]

Working the front desk at a fancy movie theater for the premiere of #SpiderMan by myself . This is chill

[Derek @ddalton99]

Howdy friends 🤠 the newest album from The Cannibals is now available on all streaming platforms. Plz run up our streams #rock #and #roll

[Derek @ddalton99]

Super excited that The Cannibals are releasing our 2nd album “Life and Times”. Available everywhere on September 25th!!!!!

[Derek @ddalton99]

@JoshuaA86032329

[Derek @ddalton99]

Having a long commute to work sucks but at least it gives me time to cry to the Tarzan soundtrack on the way home

[Derek @ddalton99]

Now that I’m on my third dead-end job this year I’ve realize that I should’ve just tried harder to be a professional athlete

[Derek @ddalton99]

@JoshuaA86032329 @barstoolsports https://t.co/U7piEc4Nws get me a job over there while you’re at it lol

[Derek @ddalton99]

My neighbors are having a wedding in the backyard. I think I’ll go ahead ruin it by getting out my guitar and covering every single Oasis song as loud as possible 🤪😉🥴

[Derek @ddalton99]

@GregAbbott_TX

[Derek @ddalton99]

@ericweinstein 🥴

[Derek @ddalton99]

Looks like I’m not retiring any time soon :^(

[Derek @ddalton99]

Live look at me quitting my job and putting all my money into Dogecoin

[Derek @ddalton99]

@termchill6969 “An act of retardation” sounds like my future autobiography

[Derek @ddalton99]

I really have to go back to California today :(

[Derek @ddalton99]

how Modern Men make cherry bombs

[Derek @ddalton99]

It’s feels good to wake up in the morning and not breathe in that dirty California air