wraith

with angels like these, who needs devils? • subhuman traumasauce • cw i'm sorry

[wraith @deadweightwings]

tonight i give birth to my mother. tomorrow night she returns the favor.

[wraith @deadweightwings]

the narcissism required to stand atop a mountain that is older than bones and scream 'i matter, watch me writhe'. the hubris to make something out of nothing. the sweet, sweet fall from grace. i want to savor it, before it's over.

[wraith @deadweightwings]

i've had a fixation on death ever since i was small. i've thought about it a lot, and i think i finally settled on what it feels like. i think it probably feels like suffocating forever.

[wraith @deadweightwings]

maybe that's why i find simulated cruelty so beautiful. the love of suffering. to meet the cold nihilism of the universe with a warm embrace, to take strife as a friend and lover, to hold the face of meaninglessness close to your breast.

[wraith @deadweightwings]

i'm still here, even though they wanted me dead. that's worth something, isn't it?

[wraith @deadweightwings]

If it doesn't make me desirable then what was it for? How can anything else make it ok? How am I supposed to remember it was real if you won't fuck me for it? I'll forget! I'll forget and go crazy again

[wraith @deadweightwings]

what the fuck do you mean being a victim doesn't make girls want me more? what don't they get? look at me! Look at these scars! They're the real deal! I'll prove it! Look! Look at them!!!

[wraith @deadweightwings]

i love you enough to sit through this unhappiness. I'll be waiting for you when you get back. There's no better place for me than to sit by the door expectantly. I don't care if I rot here <3 https://t.co/AgavA2VTb4

[wraith @deadweightwings]

>Is forcing happiness upon me your idea of love? Am I supposed to pretend for you?
-Why are you miscontruing my intentions? It makes me feel good to service you. Let me service you! I don't care how it makes you feel!

[wraith @deadweightwings]

i want you to be happy but i don't mind if you're not. i want you to love me but loving you is enough. even if all you can spare for me are scraps, i'll remain devoted.

i want you to use me but witnessing you is enough.

[wraith @deadweightwings]

>are you doing this because you want to, or because you think it'll make me happy?
-what's the difference? what i want is for you to be happy
>there's a huge difference! how am i supposed to know what's flattery and what's sincere?
-What could be more sincere than an act of love?

[wraith @deadweightwings]

"...i can call you whatever makes you feel most comfortable while you rape me"

[wraith @deadweightwings]

One of the final, most important steps in breaking an angel is to expose her to others who are still early in the process. Make her understand that she's just as powerless to help them now as she was to help herself back then.

[wraith @deadweightwings]

...how did everything get so twisted up?

[wraith @deadweightwings]

empty spaces come and go but traumasauce is forever

[wraith @deadweightwings]

compared to the taste of fresh death, everything else is kibble

[wraith @deadweightwings]

hah fuck. you made me break the one rule i set for myself. i'm not ok with disappearing anymore ❤️‍🩹

[wraith @deadweightwings]

otherwise, even after all of this.

[wraith @deadweightwings]

i am full to bursting with hate tonight. There is a terrible thing inside me, writhing and squirming and threatening to escape my throat. The more I push it down, the blacker it becomes, and the more its corruption seeps into my heart, waterlogging with viscous black substance,

[wraith @deadweightwings]

horrible and rotten I am right down to my core. As if I could expose this part to the sun and not expect to lose the love and respect I clawed out of every single goddamn person I know. I've always known it worked that way. The gall I must have to feel comfortable dreaming