David Harbaugh

No bio so now you have to guess my favorite scripture and Marilyn Monroe quote 🤷🏼‍♀️

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Me: Conditions in the Air Force are not that cushy!

Also me...this morning on a bumpy road while my troop drives: Slow down! If you make me spill my latte I’m gonna be mad!

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Nobody:

Every white girl who’s between shows: Never watched a single episode of GOT but do I have time to binge 7 seasons before the premier?? I HATE being left out of office conversations 🤷🏼‍♀️

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Guy walks up to table as I’m midway through a mozzarella stick.
Guy: This is so weird, but can I have your number? I lost a bet and I’m not allowed to leave here without a guys number.
Me:...............................sure?

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Hey! Guy at the gym mixing protein for the last 58 seconds! I can hear you rattling that shaker bottle from across the room and over questionably loud @ArianaGrande in my ear. I think your bubblegum explosion is ready 😑

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

@Whataburger I’m deployed so not until August unless you wanna hook a pal up 🤷🏼‍♀️

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

@chelssalyer You are way behind girl lol

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Me: If I’m ever bleeding from my butt just kill me please.
Laurel: No...I’d take you to the vet.
Me:.......thanks 😂

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

@lkp_94 I didn’t choose this life 😪 lol

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

@KaceyMusgraves I’m deployed in the Middle East working with some foreign nationals today and Butterflies comes on. They all stop and give me a thumbs up and say “Miss Kacey good!” Just thought I’d let you know they love you over here 👍🏻

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Laurel: “There’s Rachel’s house. I don’t see her car. I hope she’s out buying me treats.”

😂😂

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

@lkp_94 Wait! They are supposed to be fully clothed??? Because I think I’m about to win a lawsuit lol.

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

@SdotO In the words of Dwight, good not great 🤷🏼‍♀️

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

It’s October 3rd and if you don’t understand why that’s important then you can’t sit with us. 💁🏼‍♀️😎

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Me: I’m really excited to take you camping in June.
Laurel: Me too! Lucky for you I can go days without showering.
Me: ..... 😳

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Jim: One day Michael came in complaining about a speed bump on the highway......I wonder who he ran over then. 🤔

#MichaelScott

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Creed: “That is northern lights cannabis indica.”
Dwight: (Sigh) “no....it’s marijuana.”

😂😂😂

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

#NewProfilePic

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

The only reason I buy trash bags with the ties is so that I don’t spend 3 hours trying to figure out which side opens 🤷🏼‍♀️ #lifehacks

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Flight update: we landed in 1hr 9min 😂 #UnitedAirlines

[David Harbaugh @deharb1]

Flying home for Christmas...
Pilot: “Sorry for the delay folks. We’re gonna do everything we can to make it up now that we’re in the air. Official flight plan says 2hrs 6min. We’ll be landing at 1hr 19mim by my calculations.”