ell espineli

A learner for life

[ell espineli @delishdays]

London glows on a Saturday ☀️

[ell espineli @delishdays]

Anyone I meet adds something new to me💡

[ell espineli @delishdays]

It now turned what was once a road of total stress and fatigue to one of comparative ease, or at least manageability 😮‍💨

[Ryan Daigler - Exposing Narcissistic Abuse 🚩🚩 @Ryan_Daigler]

•Selective Amnesia: Conveniently forgetting past promises, agreements, or incidents that are inconvenient or unfavorable to the narcissist.
•Intellectual Bullying: Using intellectual superiority to intimidate, belittle, or invalidate the victim's opinions or beliefs.
•Identity Erosion: Undermining the victim's sense of self by criticizing their interests, goals, or values, or by attempting to reshape their identity to align with the narcissist's desires.
•Exploitation of Vulnerabilities: Exploiting the victim's vulnerabilities, insecurities, or past traumas to gain leverage and control over them.
•Manipulative Praise: Offering praise or compliments with strings attached, or using flattery to manipulate the victim into compliance.
•Minimization: Downplaying the impact of the abuse or dismissing the victim's concerns as overreaction or hypersensitivity.
•Intermittent Reinforcement: Alternating between periods of affection, kindness, or validation and periods of abuse or neglect to keep the victim emotionally invested and confused.
•Weaponizing Empathy: Pretending to be the victim in situations where they are confronted or challenged, appealing to the victim's empathy to avoid accountability.
•Gaslighting by Proxy: Enlisting others, such as friends, family members, or colleagues, to gaslight or manipulate the victim on behalf of the narcissist.

[Ryan Daigler - Exposing Narcissistic Abuse 🚩🚩 @Ryan_Daigler]

•Gaslighting: Manipulating the victim's perception of reality, making them doubt their memories, feelings, or sanity.
•Projection: Blaming the victim for behaviors or traits that are actually characteristic of the abuser.
•Triangulation: Introducing a third party into the relationship dynamic to create jealousy, insecurity, or competition.
•Hoovering: Oscillating between idealization and devaluation to keep the victim emotionally invested and reliant on the abuser.
•Silent Treatment: Withholding communication, attention, or affection as a means of punishment or control.
•Invalidation: Dismissing the victim's thoughts, feelings, or experiences, making them feel unworthy or insignificant.
•Love-Bombing: Overwhelming the victim with excessive attention, affection, or gifts to gain their trust and dependence.
• Future faking: making promises or commitments about the future with no intention of following through.
•Smear Campaigns: Spreading false information or rumors about the victim to discredit them and isolate them from support networks.
•Financial Exploitation: Using the victim's financial resources for the abuser's benefit without regard for their needs or well-being.
•Emotional Blackmail: Threatening to withhold love, affection, or support unless the victim complies with the abuser's demands or desires.
•Coercive Control: Establishing dominance and control through various manipulative tactics such as isolation, surveillance, intimidation, and emotional abuse.

[Ryan Daigler - Exposing Narcissistic Abuse 🚩🚩 @Ryan_Daigler]

#NarcissisticAbuse is a vicious form of pathological abuse. Some say it is a covert form of murder, death by 1000 little cuts. These abuse tactics include:
Gaslighting
Projection
Triangulation
Hoovering
Silent treatment
Invalidation
Love-bombing
Future faking
Smear campaigns
Financial exploitation
Emotional blackmail
Coercive control
DARVO (Deny, accuse, reverse victim and offender)
Selective amnesia
Intellectual bullying
Identity erosion
Exploitation of Vulnerabilities
Manipulative praise
Minimization
Intermittent reinforcement
Weaponizing empathy
Gaslighting by proxy

The insidious nature of narcissistic abuse lies in its ability to erode the victim's self-esteem, identity, and autonomy over time, leaving lasting psychological scars. Victims of narcissistic abuse may experience complex trauma, anxiety, depression, and difficulty forming healthy relationships in the future. Some “commit suicide” although I don’t consider suicide as a result of abuse as suicide. I consider it murder by the perpetrator’s psychological erosion of the victim which leads to death.
Narcissistic abuse tactics can be varied and complex, and new tactics emerge as individuals adapt their behavior to maintain control over their victims.
Please read on for a comprehensive description of each of these abuse tactics: 🧵

[ell espineli @delishdays]

Move with strategy, not with emotions.

[ell espineli @delishdays]

If there’s something that you can’t fix, just step over it 😎

[ell espineli @delishdays]

After certain things have happened, I don't feel the same way about people anymore, no matter who they are.

[ell espineli @delishdays]

As bad as I want to address it, it’s best to let God defend me.

[ell espineli @delishdays]

With kindness and belief in you,

E. Espineli 🦋

[ell espineli @delishdays]

Please set standards for the people you want in your life. It's not selfish. It's not rude. It's imperative. You are allowed to determine who gets access to you. You are allowed to want people in your life who make you feel light and supported. You can set that standard.

[ell espineli @delishdays]

❤️‍🔥

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

Emotionally immature parents believe their adult children's role isn't to find their own identity, it's to fix their feelings of inadequacy.

Why emotionally immature parents create resentment:

[ell espineli @delishdays]

Sunday’s best ❤️

[ell espineli @delishdays]

💟

[ell espineli @delishdays]

This will be the year it all comes together.

[Poem Heaven @PoemHeaven]

has this ever happened to you?

[☔ @Whotfismick]

A mystery I'll never solve

[ell espineli @delishdays]

We’ve come to the end of our striving and natural solutions and we put our trust in Him no matter what.