Derek Lewis

I’m probably eating candy

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Here’s a folded piece of cardstock with a sketch of a donkey on the front that you ALREADY KNOW is gonna have an “ass” pun inside when you open it. That’ll be $5.99.

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

I’ve never watched golf but I recognized every single sports celebrity who has a cameo in Happy Gilmore 2. Never by their name or face. Just by their bad acting.

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

I spent a good portion of #Superman talking myself into and then out of and then back into the idea that this was Trixie Mattel

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Here are four scenes from Jurassic Park that the creators of Jurassic World Rebirth saw and said, “Let’s just do that again but worse”

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Liberty Mutual’s CEO: “We need a jingle”

“Liberty”

CEO: “I’m not sure that’s enough”

“Maybe add three more ‘liberty’s after that one?”

CEO: “Love it”

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Reaction QUEEN

#TheWhiteLotus

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

It doesn’t make sense to say Jake Tapper looks like a Pixar dad but it doesn’t NOT make sense

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

That fruit is most definitely going to meet that blender before this season of The White Lotus is over.

[Complex Music @ComplexMusic]

Chappell Roan demands that labels "offer a livable wage and healthcare, especially to developing artists... Labels, we got you, but do you got us?"

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

I saw a GIRL in zee castle!

[XXL Magazine @XXL]

Cardi B has arrived at the #Grammys

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Every last person in the Ozdust Ballroom lookin like a Dr. Seuss character and rockin out to a mouse on the drums, snickering at Elphaba’s hat like it’s even the TENTH weirdest thing in that room. Sure, sis.

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Could there BE a more perfect trio to compete in #Jeopardy?

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

The inventor of the leaf blower:

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

The Princess Diaries 3: Momma Mia 👸🏼👶🏻

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

“HARRY, DID YOU PUT YOUR NAME IN THE GOBLET OF FIRE?!”

Same energy here.

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

@T8shusband Tbh I wasn’t entirely ready for it either 🫠

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Happy premiere day to the 47th(!) season of a show that in some ways is more fun and exciting to be a fan of now than ever before. Still riding high from the #Survivor Beach Drop event in Nashville last weekend

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

I need a supercut of every last one of Mackenzie Davis’s pained smiles, uncomfy grimaces, and “wtf” side-eyes in #SpeakNoEvilMovie. They were a character unto themselves.

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

You know how some ride-share apps allow you to request quiet? I wish hairdressers offered that.

[Derek Lewis @dereklew]

Why do stores that sell KIND Bars never sell THEE BEST KIND Bars?