I finally figured out that true love isn't about the high, the butterflies, or the easy moments.
It's about choosing someone even when it's hard, when the spark fades, when life gets tough, when you're not feeling it, but you still show up. That's real love.
And if you walk away just because it gets hard, you'll never know how beautiful it could ve been when you chose to stay and build something stronger.
i think the purest form of love is just wanting someone to notice life with you. "taste this. look at that. hear this song." again and again. until you can't imagine noticing life without them.
kamu harus patah berapa kali lagi buat dipertemukan sama seseorang yang bukan cuma “baik” tapi juga stabil secara emosinya. karena kebaikan bisa berubah kalau lagi capek, tapi emosi yang stabil bikin dia tetap waras saat keadaan lagi gak baik-baik aja.
relationship is not just about "love and sweet moments," tapi soal gimana dia handle marahnya, kecewanya, egonya.
good person is nice, but emotionally mature person is necessary.
According to attachment theory, genuine love is reflected in how someone responds to your pain, not just your presence. When someone truly values your wellbeing, their deepest fear isn't losing access to you - it's causing you harm. But when someone only loves what you provide for them they fear losing their supply, not hurting your heart. This subtle difference reveals everything about whether you're loved for who you are or what you give. Notice which one keeps them awake at night.
Konon, patah hati tanpa closure itu mirip gejala sakau obat.
Saat jatuh cinta, otak memproduksi hormon bahagia, di antaranya oksitosin (kedekatan) dan dopamin (motivasi/reward).
Ketika putus, apalagi tanpa closure, otak kita mengirim sinyal darurat dan memproduksi hormon stres seperti kortisol.
Penurunan drastis hormon bahagia ini membuat otak “sakau”, mirip pecandu yang diputus paksa. Makanya, rasa sakitnya betul-betul terasa sampai ke fisik, kayak dada terasa sesak atau nyesek.
Teman-teman nakes boleh banget menambahkan atau mengoreksi.
Sekarang, yang perlu dipikirkan bukan bagaimana agar dia kembali, tapi bagaimana menurunkan stres dan kadar kortisol.
Tujuannya agar otak kita dapat kembali berpikir sehat dan tidak melakukan hal-hal yang lebih tolol.
Hal-hal berikut dapat membantu:
- Ke psikolog.
- Olahraga.
- Melakukan hobi yang menyenangkan.
- Mengurangi gula dan kafein.
- Ngobrol dengan teman.
- Menikmati keindahan alam atau sekadar berada di luar ruangan dan memandangi tanaman.
Prosesnya mungkin tidak sebentar dan cukup berdarah-darah, take your time.
Bersedih dan patah hatilah secukupnya, lalu kembali tegakkan kepala dan busungkan dada.
YOU ARE WORTH IT!