dettss2400

[dettss2400 @dettss3]

@kendradlinton I saw you guys while waiting in the merch line this morning! I’m so sorry it didn’t work out for you. I told my husband surely you’d have good luck. ☹️

[alfie @alfienxo]

sorry for how i acted when there were multiple noises happening at the same time

[໊ @sonohoor]

for a girl that loves sleep and hates stress my career choice is questionable

[kate salk @katesalkz]

this is the same look you give the waiter when your grandpa is yelling trying to get something taken off the bill

[Robert Sterling @RobertMSterling]

The best random part about having small kids is how they mispronounce things and it’s so adorable that you not only don’t correct them, you start adopting it yourself.

During Covid, our daughter couldn’t say “hand sanitizer” correctly. Three years later and we all still call it “hanzatizer.”

When my son was two, he had a toy Elmo guitar that he called his “kintar.” My wife and I only stopped pronouncing it like that once he started real kintar lessons and we sounded dumb in front of the teacher.

Our toddler is two and she calls her backpack a “pack pack.” Now the other kids talk about getting their pack packs ready for school every day.

We’re having pasghetti for dinner tonight.

It probably sounds stupid, but it’s little things like this that make parenthood—despite all the challenges—an irreplaceable joy.

[ezake⁷ @chukosad]

We desperately need to address how bright some people’s headlights are

[Kay @KaylarWill]

We have not had one day of peace since last Monday.

[Danny Deraney @DannyDeraney]

This is awesome!

Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan reunite at Katz Deli for a Hellman's Super Bowl commercial. 😂😂

#whenharrymetsally

[Rep. Jake Auchincloss 🟧 @RepAuchincloss]

I come from a family of doctors & cancer researchers. My district is full of medical professionals. RFK, Jr. is an anti-vax conspiracist. While we hear from him today, here’s the facts on what he did to kids in Samoa & why the Senate must reject him:

[Rep. Jake Auchincloss 🟧 @RepAuchincloss]

He wants to stop the development of new medicines for cancer and Alzheimer’s, which he impugns as pharmaceutical poison. His first week, he promised to give drug development and infectious disease research a “little bit of a break.” For eight years.

[Hustlanani @hustlanani]

Being a baby must be scary, imagine sleeping at home & you wake up at TJ Maxx

[Nick Lehmann @NickStopTalking]

Being a person with a brain and someone who can read during this period of history is really really difficult

[Lydia Kauppi @lydiakauppi]

Literally a gold metal performance

[Matt Stehman @MattStehman]

For anyone who wonders why republicans attack education so fiercely, tonight is your answer.

[Susie Dent @susie_dent]

Word of the day is ‘recrudescence’ (17th century): the return of something terrible after a time of reprieve.

[Spooky Blaylock 🎃🕷️ @velodus]

The single worst thing about Trump to me will always be how much he's changed people. I've watched friends and relatives become entirely new, worse people in the wake of his political rise. Like it's not merely that he's a terrible guy, it's that he's ruined people.