*Can’t open jar so asks someone else to open it*
*They open it*
Brain:
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Don’t say it.
Me- “I loosened it for you!!!”
Doctors must hate Phil Kessel. They can't figure out how he skates with that frame. It's like being at a red light in your Lamborghini. Light turns green and the Ford Focus next to you just fuckin smokes you in a race. It's Phil, he's with your girl. He laughs right in your face.